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THE PETER PATTER BOOK
OF NURSERY RHYMES

THE KING HAD A PLATTER OF BRISKET AND BATTER
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THE PETER PATTER BOOK
of
NURSERY RHYMES
by Pictures by
LEROY F. BLANCHE
JACKSON FISHER WRIGHT

To
ANDREW, PUDGE, AND BOBBY
My first appreciative audience

Copyright © 1918 by Rand McNally & Company.
Renewal copyright 1946
by Rand McNally & Co.
All rights reserved.

PETER PATTER told them to me,
All the little rimes,
Whispered them among the bushes
Half a hundred times.
Peter lives upon a mountain
Pretty near the sun,
Knows the bears and birds and rabbits
Nearly every one;
Has a home among the alders,
Bed of cedar bark,
Walks alone beneath the pine trees
Even when it’s dark.
Squirrels tell him everything
That happens in the trees,
Cricket in the gander-grass
Sings of all he sees;
Rimes from bats and butterflies,
Crabs and waterfowl;
But the best of all he gets
From his Uncle Owl.
Sometimes when its day-time,
But mostly in the night,
They sit beneath an oak tree
And hug each other tight,
And tell their rimes and riddles
Where the catty creatures prowl—
Funny little Peter Patter
And his Uncle Owl.

LIST OF THE RHYMES

  • Page
  • A Copper Down a Crack [9]
  • I'm Much Too Big for a Fairy [9]
  • Did You Ever Play Tag with a Tiger? [9]
  • The Blue Song [10]
  • Hippity Hop to Bed [10]
  • Away to the River [11]
  • Our Little Pat [12]
  • The Animal Show [12]
  • Tommy Trimble[12]
  • Dickie, Dickie Dexter[14]
  • On the Road to Tattletown[14]
  • Polly and Peter[14]
  • I Went to Town on Monday[15]
  • Where Are You Going?[16]
  • Christopher Crump[17]
  • Pinky, Pinky, Pang[18]
  • Tick, Tock[18]
  • Under the Willow[20]
  • High on the Mantel[20]
  • Boots, Boots, Boots[21]
  • Butterfly[22]
  • Beela By the Sea[22]
  • A Matter of Taste[23]
  • Tommy, My Son[23]
  • Oh, Said the Worm[23]
  • Buzzy Brown[24]
  • The Wind[24]
  • The Hobo Band[24]
  • A Beetle on a Broomstraw[26]
  • Mule Thoughts[26]
  • A Candle, a Candle[27]
  • Baxter[28]
  • Loddy, Gin, and Ella Zander[28]
  • As I Was Going Down the Hill[28]
  • A Little Boy Ran to the End of the Sky[30]
  • Discretion[31]
  • A Beetle Once Sat on a Barberry Twig[31]
  • The Thieves[32]
  • Upon The Irish Sea[32]
  • Duckle, Daisy[32]
  • I’ve Got a New Book[34]
  • The Carrot and the Rabbit[35]
  • Hippy-Hi-Hoppy[35]
  • Up on the Garden Gate[37]
  • ’Most Any Chip[37]
  • A Moon Song[37]
  • What Makes You Laugh?[38]
  • Timmy O’Toole[38]
  • A Man Came From Malden[39]
  • Baron Batteroff[39]
  • Six Little Salmon[39]
  • To Carry on the Toot-Toot[40]
  • Doubbledoon[40]
  • The Party[42]
  • I’ve Got a Yellow Puppy[43]
  • Doctor McSwattle[45]
  • Columbus[45]
  • Terrible Tim[46]
  • What’s the Use?[46]
  • All Aboard for Bombay[47]
  • Water[47]
  • Old Molly is Lowing[48]
  • Snowflakes[48]
  • Dippy-Dippy-Davy[48]
  • When I’m as Rich as Uncle Claus[50]
  • Rinky-Tattle[50]
  • Twenty Little Snowflakes[51]
  • Slippery Slim[51]
  • The Freighter[53]
  • No One at Home[53]
  • Patters and Tatters[53]
  • Crown the King with Carrot Tops[54]
  • The Canada Goose[54]
  • Hipperty, Clickerty, Clackerty, Bang[55]
  • Sonny[56]
  • The Stove[56]
  • The Thunder Baby[58]
  • Hinky, Pinky, Pearly Earl[59]
  • Tipsy Tom[60]
  • Jolly Jinks[60]
  • Transformation[60]
  • The Thief Chase[62]
  • Somebody[62]
  • Consolation[ 63]
  • The Robin and the Squirrel[63]
  • The King Had a Platter[63]
  • Rain[64]
  • Old Father McNether[64]
  • Jerry Was a Joker [64]
  • King Kokem[66]
  • Old Missus Skinner[67]
  • Oh, Mother[69]
  • Cella Ree and Tommy To[69]
  • If I Were Richer[70]
  • The Army of the Queen[70]
  • Romulus[70]
  • The Hero[72]
  • Pensive Percy[72]
  • Moon, O Moon in the Empty Sky[73]
  • The Rag-Man[75]
  • Whenever I Go Out to Walk[75]
  • A Free Show[76]
  • Billy Bumpkins[76]
  • Blue Flames and Red Flames[77]
  • Timothy Grady[77]
  • Captain Tickle and his Nickel[77]
  • Grandmother Grundy[78]
  • Needles and Pins[78]
  • A Toe Rime[78]
  • Harry Hooker[78]
  • Jelly Jake and Butter Bill[80]
  • Cut Up a Caper [81]
  • Eat, Eat, Eat[83]
  • Hetty Hutton[83]
  • A Big, Fat Potato[84]
  • A Bundle of Hay[85]
  • Peter, Popper[86]
  • Old Father Annum[86]
  • The Tippany Flower[86]
  • Here Comes a Cabbage[88]
  • Plenty[89]
  • The Runaways[89]
  • A Race, A Race to Moscow[91]
  • The Salesman[91]
  • A Prince from Pepperville[91]
  • Boats[92]
  • Pretty Things[92]
  • Did You Ever?[92]
  • Hootem, Tootem, Clear the Track[94]
  • Doctor Drake[94]
  • Babies[95]
  • Twenty Thieves From Albion[95]
  • As I Came Out of Grundy Greet[96]

—B. F. Wright—
JINGLE, JINGLE, JACK, A COPPER DOWN A CRACK
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A COPPER DOWN A CRACK

Jingle, jingle, Jack,
A copper down a crack.
Twenty men and all their wives,
With sticks and picks and pocket knives,
Digging for their very lives
To get the copper back.

I’M MUCH TOO BIG FOR A FAIRY

I’m much too big for a fairy,
And much too small for a man,
But this is true:
Whatever I do,
I do it the best I can.

DID YOU EVER PLAY TAG WITH A TIGER?

Did you ever play tag with a tiger,
Or ever play boo with a bear;
Did you ever put rats in the rain-barrel
To give poor old Granny a scare?
It’s fun to play tag with a tiger,
It’s fun for the bear to say “boo,”
But if rats are found in the rain-barrel
Old Granny will put you in too.

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THE BLUE SONG

Hot mush and molasses all in a blue bowl—
Eat it, it’s good for you, sonny.
’T will make you grow tall as a telephone pole—
Eat it, it’s good for you, sonny.
Fresh fish and potatoes all on a blue plate—
Eat it up smart now, my sonny.
’T will make you as jolly and fat as Aunt Kate—
Eat it up quick now, my sonny.
Sweet milk from a nanny-goat in a blue cup—
Drink it, it’s good for you, sonny,
’T will fill you, expand you, and help you grow up,
And make a real man of you, sonny.

HIPPITY HOP TO BED

O it’s hippity hop to bed!
I’d rather sit up instead.
But when father says “must,”
There’s nothing but just
Go hippity hop to bed.

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AWAY TO THE RIVER

Away to the river, away to the wood,
While the grasses are green and the berries are good!
Where the locusts are scraping their fiddles and bows,
And the bees keep a-coming wherever one goes.
Oh, it’s off to the river and off to the hills,
To the land of the bloodroot and wild daffodils,
With a buttercup blossom to color my chin,
And a basket of burs to put sandberries in.

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OUR LITTLE PAT

Our little Pat
Was chasing the cat
And kicking the kittens about.
When mother said “Quit!”
He ran off to sit
On the top of the woodpile and pout;
But a sly little grin
Soon slid down his chin
And let all the sulkiness out.

THE ANIMAL SHOW

Father and mother and Bobbie will go
To see all the sights at the animal show.
Where lions and bears
Sit on dining room chairs,
Where a camel is able
To stand on a table,
Where monkeys and seals
All travel on wheels,
And a Zulu baboon
Rides a baby balloon.
The sooner you’re ready, the sooner we’ll go.
Aboard, all aboard, for the Animal Show!

THE ANIMAL SHOW
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TOMMY TRIMBLE

Billy be nimble,
Hurry and see
Old Tommy Trimble
Climbing a tree.
He claws with his fingers
And digs with his toes.
The longer he lingers
The slower he goes.

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DICKIE, DICKIE DEXTER

Dickie, Dickie Dexter
Had a wife and vexed her.
She put him in a rabbit cage
And fed him peppermint and sage—
Dickie, Dickie Dexter.

ON THE ROAD TO TATTLETOWN

On the road to Tattletown
What is this I see?
A pig upon a pedestal,
A cabbage up a tree,
A rabbit cutting capers
With a twenty dollar bill—
Now if I don’t get to Tattletown
Then no one ever will.

POLLY AND PETER

Polly had some china cows
And Peter had a gun.
She turned the bossies out to browse,
And Peterkin, for fun,
Just peppered them with butter beans
And blew them all to smithereens.
* * *
Now what will pretty Polly do
For milk and cream and butter too?

I WENT TO TOWN ON MONDAY

I went to town on Monday
To buy myself a coat,
But on the way I met a man
Who traveled with a caravan,
And bought a billy-goat.
I went to town on Tuesday
And bought a fancy vest.
I kept the pretty bucklestraps,
Buttonholes and pocketflaps,
And threw away the rest.

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I went to town on Thursday
To buy a loaf of bread,
But when I got there, goodness sakes!
The town was full of rattlesnakes—
The bakers all were dead.

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I went to town on Saturday
To get myself a wife,
But when I saw the lady fair
I gnashed my teeth and pulled my hair
And scampered for my life.

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WHERE ARE YOU GOING?

Where are you going, sister Kate?
I’m going to swing on the garden gate,
And watch the fairy gypsies dance
Their tim-tam-tum on the cabbage-plants—
The great big one with the purple nose,
And the tiny tad with the pinky toes.
Where are you going, brother Ben?
I’m going to build a tiger-pen.
I’ll get iron and steel and ’lectric wire
And build it a hundred feet, or higher,
And put ten tigers in it too,
And a big wildcat, and—mebbe—you.

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Where are you going, mother mine?
I’m going to sit by the old grapevine,
And watch the gliding swallow bring
Clay for her nest from the meadow spring—
Clay and straw and a bit of thread
To weave it into a baby’s bed.

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Where are you going, grandma dear?
I’m going, love, where the skies are clear,
And the light winds lift the poppy flowers
And gather clouds for the summer showers,
Where the old folks and the children play
On the warm hillside through the livelong day.

CHRISTOPHER CRUMP

Christopher Crump,
All in a lump,
Sits like a toad on the top of a stump.
He stretches and sighs,
And blinks with his eyes,
Bats at the beetles and fights off the flies.

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PINKY, PINKY, PANG

A tortoise sat on a slippery limb
And played his pinky pang
For a dog-fish friend that called on him,
And this is what he sang:
“Oh, the skies are blue,
And I wait for you
To come where the willows hang,
And dance all night
By the white moonlight
To my pinky, pinky, pang!”

TICK, TOCK

Tick, tock! Tick, tock!
Forty ’leven by the clock.
Tick, tock! Tick, tock!
Put your ear to Grandpa’s ticker,
Like a pancake, only thicker.
Tick, tock! Tick, tock!
Catch a squirrel in half a minute,
Grab a sack and stick him in it.
Tick, tock! Tick, tock!
Mister Bunny feeds on honey,
Tea, and taters—ain’t it funny?
Tick, tock! Tick, tock!
When he goes to bed at night,
Shoves his slippers out of sight;
That is why Old Fox, the sinner,
Had to go without his dinner.
Tick, tock! Tick, tock!
So says Grandpa’s clock.

TICK, TOCK! TICK, TOCK! FORTY ’LEVEN BY THE CLOCK
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UNDER THE WILLOW

Put down your pillow under the willow,
Hang up your hat in the sun,
And lie down to snooze as long as you choose,
For the plowing and sowing are done.
Pick up your pillow from under the willow,
And clamber out into the sun.
Get a fork and a rake for goodness’ sake,
For the harvest time has begun.

HIGH ON THE MANTEL

High on the mantel rose a moan—
It came from an idol carved in bone—
“Oh, it’s so lonesome here alone,
With no one near to love me!”
A cautious smile came over the face
Of a pensive maid on a Grecian vase
“Are you sure,” she said, with charming grace,
“There’s no one near to love you?”

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BOOTS, BOOTS, BOOTS

Buster’s got a popper gun,
A reg’lar one that shoots,
And Teddy’s got an engine
With a whistler that toots.
But I’ve got something finer yet—
A pair of rubber boots.
Oh, it’s boots, boots, boots,
A pair of rubber boots!
I could walk from here to China
In a pair of rubber boots.

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BUTTERFLY

Butterfly, butterfly,
Sit on my chin,
Your wings are like tinsel,
So yellow and thin.
Butterfly, butterfly,
Give me a kiss;
If you give me a dozen
There’s nothing amiss.
Butterfly, butterfly,
Off to the flowers,—
Wee, soulless sprite
Of the long summer hours.

BEELA BY THE SEA

Catch a floater, catch an eel,
Catch a lazy whale,
Catch an oyster by the heel
And put him in a pail.
There’s lots of work for Uncle Ike,
Fatty Ford and me
All day long and half the night
At Beela by the sea.

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A MATTER OF TASTE

“Thank you, dear,” said the big black ant,
“I’d like to go home with you now, but I can’t.
I have to hurry and milk my cows—
The aphid herds on the aster boughs.”
And the ladybug said: “No doubt it’s fine,
This milk you get from your curious kine,
But you know quite well it’s my belief
Your cows are best when turned to beef.”

TOMMY, MY SON

“Tommy, my son,” said the old tabby cat,
“Go catch us some mice, and be sure that they’re fat.
There’s one family lives in the carpenter’s barn;
They’ve made them a nest of the old lady’s yarn.
But the carpenter has a young cat of his own
That is healthy and proud and almost full grown,
And consider it, son, an eternal disgrace
To come home at night with a scratch on your face.”

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OH, SAID THE WORM

“Oh,” said the worm,
“I’m awfully tired of sitting in the trees;
I want to be a butterfly
And chase the bumblebees.”

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BUZZY BROWN

Buzzy Brown came home from town
As crazy as a loon,
He wore a purple overcoat
And sang a Sunday tune.
Buzzy Brown came home from town
As proud as he could be,
He found three doughnuts and a bun
A-growing on a tree.

THE WIND

The wind came a-whooping, down Cranberry Hill
And stole an umbrella from, Mother Medill.
It picked up a paper on Patterson’s place
And carried it clean to the Rockaby Race.
And what was more shocking and awful than that,
It blew the new feather off grandmother’s hat.

THE WIND CAME A-WHOOPING DOWN CRANBERRY HILL
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THE HOBO BAND

The roads are good and the weather’s grand,
So I’m off to play in the Hobo Band;
With a gaspipe flute and a cowhide drum
I’m going to make the music come.
With a toot, toot, toot, and a dum, dum, dum,
Just hear me make the music come!

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A BEETLE ON A BROOMSTRAW

A robin and a wren, as they walked along one night,
Saw a big brown beetle on a broomstraw.
Said the robin to the wren: “What a pretty, pretty sight—
That big brown beetle on a broomstraw!”
So they got their plates and knives,
Their children and their wives,
And gobbled up the beetle on the broomstraw.

MULE THOUGHTS

A silly little mule
Sat on a milking stool
And tried to write a letter to his father.
But he couldn’t find the ink,
So he said: “I rather think
This writing letters home is too much bother.”

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A CANDLE, A CANDLE

A candle, a candle
To light me to bed;
A pillow, a pillow
To tuck up my head.
The moon is as sleepy as sleepy can be,
The stars are all pointing their fingers at me,
And Missus Hop-Robin, way up in her nest,
Is rocking her tired little babies to rest.
So give me a blanket
To tuck up my toes,
And a little soft pillow
To snuggle my nose.

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BAXTER

Baxter had a billy-goat
Wall-eyed and double jointed.
He took him to the barber shop
And had his head anointed.

LODDY, GIN, AND ELLA ZANDER

Loddy, Gin, and Ella Zander
Rode to market on a gander;
Bought a crane for half a dollar;
Loddy led him by the collar.
Mister Crane said: “Hi there, master,
Can’t you make your legs work faster?
We can’t poke along this way.”
Then he slowly flew away.
Loddy held him fast, you bet,
And he hasn’t come home yet.

AS I WAS GOING DOWN THE HILL

As I was going down the hill
In front of Missus Knapp’s
I saw the little Knapperines
All in their winter wraps—
Purple mitts and mufflers
And knitted jersey caps.
As I was coming back again
In front of Missus Knapp’s
I saw that awful lady
Give about a dozen slaps
To every little Knapperine—
I thought it was, perhaps,
Because they gathered stickers
In their knitted jersey caps.

GOING DOWN THE HILL IN FRONT OF MRS. KNAPP’S
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A LITTLE BOY RAN TO THE END OF THE SKY

A little boy ran to the end of the sky
With a rag and a pole and a gooseberry pie.
He cried: “Three cheers for the Fourth of July!”
With a rag and a pole and a gooseberry pie.
He saw three little donkeys at play,
He tickled their noses to make them bray,
And he didn’t come back until Christmas Day—
With a rag and a pole and a gooseberry pie.

DISCRETION

A man with a nickel,
A sword, and a sickle,
A pipe, and a paper of pins
Set out for the Niger
To capture a tiger—
And that’s how my story begins.
When he saw the wide ocean,
He soon took a notion
’T would be nicer to stay with his friends.
So he traded his hat
For a tortoise-shell cat—
And that’s how the chronicle ends.

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A BEETLE ONCE SAT ON A BARBERRY TWIG

A beetle once sat on a barberry twig,
And turned at the crank of a thingum-a-jig.
Needles for hornets, nippers for ants,
For the bumblebee baby a new pair of pants,
For the grizzled old gopher a hat and a wig,
The beetle ground out of his thingum-a-jig.

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THE THIEVES

Tibbitts and Bibbitts and Solomon Sly
Ran off one day with a cucumber pie.
Tibbitts was tossed by a Kensington cow,
Bibbitts was hanged on a brambleweed bough,
And poor little Solomon—what do you think?
Was drowned one dark night in a bottle of ink.

UPON THE IRISH SEA

Some one told Maria Ann,
Maria Ann told me,
That kittens ride in coffee cans
Upon the Irish Sea.
From quiet caves to rolling waves,
How jolly it must be
To travel in a coffee can
Upon the Irish Sea!
But when it snows and when it blows,
How would you like to be
A kitten in a coffee can
Upon the Irish Sea?

DUCKLE, DAISY

Duckle, duckle, daisy,
Martha must be crazy,
She went and made a Christmas cake
Of olive oil and gluten-flake,
And set it in the sink to bake,
Duckle, duckle, daisy.

DUCKLE, DUCKLE, DAISY
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I’VE GOT A NEW BOOK

I’ve got a new book from my Grandfather Hyde.
It’s skin on the cover and paper inside,
And reads about Arabs and horses and slaves,
And tells how the Caliph of Bagdad behaves.
I’d not take a goat and a dollar beside
For the book that I got from my Grandfather Hyde.

THE CARROT AND THE RABBIT

A carrot in a garden
And a rabbit in the wood.
Said the rabbit, “Beg your pardon,
But you’re surely meant for food;
Though you’ve started in to harden,
You may still be very good.”

HIPPY-HI-HOPPY

Hippy-Hi-Hoppy, the big fat toad,
Greeted his friends at a turn of the road.
Said he to the snail:
“Here’s a ring for your tail
If you’ll go into town for my afternoon mail.”
Said he to the rat:
“I have talked with the cat;
And she’ll nab you so quick you won’t know where you’re at.”
Said he to the lizard:
“I’m really no wizard,
But I’ll show you a trick that will tickle your gizzard.”
Said he to the lark:
“When it gets fairly dark
We’ll chase the mosquitoes in Peek-a-Boo Park.”
Said he to the owl:
“If it were not for your scowl
I’d like you as well as most any wild fowl.”
Said he to the wren:
“You’re tiny, but then
I’ll marry you quick, if you’ll only say when.”

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I’LL TREAT THE CLOWN
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UP ON THE GARDEN GATE

Set me up on the garden gate
And put on my Sunday tie;
I want to be there
With a round-eyed stare
When the circus band goes by.
Give me a bag of suckerettes
And give me a piece of gum,
Then I’ll get down
And treat the clown,
And give the monkey some.

’MOST ANY CHIP

’Most any chip
Will do for a ship,
If only the cargo be
Golden sand
From the beautiful land
Of far-off Arcady.
For faith will waft
The tiny craft
O’er Fancy’s shining sea.

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A MOON SONG

Who hung his hat on the moon?
The owl in his bubble balloon.
One bright summer night
He sailed out of sight,
And, hooting like Lucifer, hung in delight
His three-cornered hat on the moon.

WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?

“What makes you laugh, my little lass,
From morning until noon?”
“I saw a dappled donkey
Throwing kisses at the moon.”

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“What makes you cry, my little lass,
And get your eyes so red?”
“I saw a cruel gardener cut
A poor old cabbage head.”

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“What makes you run, my little lass?
You’re almost out of breath.”
“A pumpkin made a face at me,
And scared me half to death.”

TIMMY O’TOOLE

When Timmy O’Toole
Was going to school
He picked up a package of gum.
He treated the preacher
And Sunday-school teacher,
And gave a policeman some.

A MAN CAME FROM MALDEN

A man came from Malden to buy a blue goose.
And what became of the gander?
He went and got tipsy on blackberry juice,
And that was the end of the gander.

BARON BATTEROFF

The mighty baron, Batteroff,
Raised a whale in a watering trough.
When the whale grew large and fat
He ate the baron’s brindle cat.
But pussy, once inside the whale,
Began to tickle with her tail.
This the monster could not stand,
And spewed her out upon dry land.
That night, when all was fine as silk
And she had supped her bread and milk,
She grinned and told old Batteroff
How she got the whale to cough.

SIX LITTLE SALMON

I sing a funny song from away out west,
Of six little salmon with their hats on;
How they all left home—but I forget the rest—
The six little salmon with their hats on.

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TO GARRY ON THE TOOT-TOOT

Oh, I want to go to Garry
On the toot-toot, toot-toot,
You and I together
On the toot-toot, toot-toot.
Go run and ask your mother
For some kind of cake or other,
And a bit of cotton wadding
For your ball-suit.
Get your bobber and a bat,
And be back as quick as scat,
For we’ve got to go to Garry
On the toot-toot.

DOUBBLEDOON

Bobbin rode a rocking-horse
’Way down to Doubbledoon,
He told his little sister
He’d be back that afternoon.
But maybe after all she didn’t
Understand him right,
For he wasn’t back again
Till the middle of the night.
And what did little Bobbin see
’Way down at Doubbledoon?
He saw a crazy Arab
Throwing bubbles at the moon,
A monkey making faces
And a rabbit in a rage,
A parrot shouting “Murder!”
From the ceiling of his cage.
At last a yellow jumping-jack,
A camel, and a coon,
Chased poor little Bobbin
All the way from Doubbledoon.

BOBBIN RODE A ROCKING-HORSE TO DOUBBLEDOON
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THE PARTY

Billy Bluebird had a party
In an elder tree,
But the little black-eyed smarty
Didn’t ask us to his party
Neither you nor me.
This is what they had for dinner,
For I peeked to see:
Apple seeds and beetle finner,
And for drink the little sinner
Gave them tansy tea.
But there came an awful clatter
From that elder tree,
When he served them on a platter
Hopper-hash and brick-dust batter
Trimmed with celery!
All the folks were hale and hearty,
Happy as could be;
And that little black-eyed smarty
Left out of his funny party
Only you and me.

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I’VE GOT A YELLOW PUPPY

I’ve got a yellow puppy,
And I’ve got a speckled hen,
I’ve got a lot of little
Spotted piggies in a pen.
I’ve got a gun that used to shoot,
Another one that squirts,
I’ve got some horehound candy
And a pair of woolen shirts.
I’ve got a little rubber ball
They use for playing golf,
And mamma thinks that’s maybe why
I’ve got the whooping-cough.

DOCTOR McSWATTLE FILLED UP A BOTTLE
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DOCTOR McSWATTLE

Doctor McSwattle
Filled up a bottle
With vinegar, varnish, and rum.
And offered a swallow
To all who would follow
The call of his trumpet and drum.
It’s good, I am told,
For a cough or a cold;
It’s good for a pain in your thumb.

COLUMBUS

Columbus sailed over the ocean blue
To find the United States.
In three small ships he carried his crew,
And none of the three were mates.
He found a land in the western seas,
And Indians galore,
With jabbering parrots in the trees,
And sharks along the shore.

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He filled his pockets with sparkling stones
And took to the mighty main,
With a couple of slaves, some nuts and cones
For the glorious king of Spain.
Now this is the tale Columbus told,
And most of the tale is true,
How he crossed the seas, a sailor bold,
In fourteen-ninety-two.

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TERRIBLE TIM

Haven’t you heard of Terrible Tim!
Well, don’t you get in the way of him.
He eats lions for breakfast
And leopards for lunch,
And gobbles them down
With one terrible crunch.
He could mix a whole city
All up in a mess,
He could drink up a sea
Or an ocean, I guess.
You’d better be watching for Terrible Tim,
And run when you first get your peepers on him.

WHAT’S THE USE?

“What’s the use,”
Said the goose,
“To swim like a frog,
When you go just as far
If you float on a log?”
“Why should I,”
Said the fly,
“Suck an old apple-core,
When there’s sugar and fruit
In the grocery store?”
“It’s but right,”
Said the kite,
“That I follow the wind.
What’s a fellow to do
If he hasn’t a mind?”
“You’ll allow,”
Said the cow,
“That I’m really no thief,
When I turn all the clover
I steal, into beef.”
“Come again,”
Said the hen,
“On some other fine day.
Don’t think ’cause I cackle
I always must lay.”

ALL ABOARD FOR BOMBAY

All aboard for Bombay,
All aboard for Rome!
Leave your little sisters
And your loving aunts at home.
Bring a bit of bailing wire,
A pocketful of nails,
And half a dozen wiener-wursts
For every man that sails.
Tell Terry Tagg, when you go by,
Be sure to bring his dog.
All aboard for Bombay
On a floating cedar log!

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WATER

There’s water in the rain barrel,
And water in the well,
There’s lots of water in the pond
Where Hannah Hawkins fell.
There’s water in the ocean,
And water in the skies,
And when a fellow blubbers
He gets water in his eyes.
But in the Barca desert
Where the hippodoodles play,
The water in the rivers
Just dries up and blows away.

OLD MOLLY IS LOWING

Old Molly is lowing and lowing
’Way down in the old meadow lot.
I’ve given her water and clover,
And all of the apples I’ve got;
But she won’t eat a thing that I give her,
And never drinks even a sup,
For they’ve taken her baby to market
And some one has eaten it up.
I’d just like to go to the city
And cut them all up into halves
And feed them to sharks and to lions—
Those people that eat little calves.

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SNOWFLAKES

The snowflakes are falling by ones and by twos;
There’s snow on my jacket, and snow on my shoes;
There’s snow on the bushes, and snow on the trees—
It’s snowing on everything now, if you please.

THE SNOWFLAKES ARE FALLING BY ONES AND BY TWOS
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DIPPY-DIPPY-DAVY

Dippy-Dippy-Davy,
Half the Royal Navy
In the dampness and the dark
Was driving off a savage shark
To Dippy-Dippy-Davy.

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WHEN I’M AS RICH AS UNCLE CLAUS

When I’m as rich as Uncle Claus,
With whiskers on my chin,
I’m going to have a great big house
To put my people in.
I’ll never let them wander out
Or ride with me to town;
They’ll come a-running when I shout
And tremble when I frown.
I’ll have some men in soldier tents,
A pirate and his mate,
And wildcats all around the fence,
And mad dogs on the gate.

RINKY-TATTLE

Rinky-tattle, rinky-tattle,
Rinky-tattle—who?
Little Tommy Taylor
Is a rinky-tattle too.

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TWENTY LITTLE SNOWFLAKES

Twenty little snowflakes climbing up a wire.
“Now, listen,” said their mother, “don’t you climb up any higher.
The sun will surely catch you, and scorch you with his fire.”
But the naughty little snowflakes didn’t mind a word she said,
Each tried to clamber faster than his fellow just ahead;
They thought that they’d be back in time enough to go to bed.
But they found out that their mother wasn’t quite the dunce they thought her,
The sun bobbed up—remember this, my little son and daughter—
And turned those twenty snowflakes into twenty drops of water.

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SLIPPERY SLIM

Slippery Slim, a garter snake,
Leaned against a garden rake
And smiled a sentimental smile
At Tilly Toad, on the gravel pile,
Till that bashful miss was forced to hop
And hide her face in a carrot-top.

THROUGH FOG AND RAIN I RUN MY TRAIN
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THE FREIGHTER

Through fog and rain
I run my train
Wherever the track is laid,
And over the road
I carry a load
Whenever the freight is paid.
A kaddy of tea
For Genessee,
For Troy an empty crate,
A man in brown
For Uniontown
To help them celebrate.

NO ONE AT HOME

No one at home in the hen-house,
And no one at home in the barn,
Old Brindle has gone to the neighbor’s
To borrow a skein of brown yarn,
To borrow yarn for the darning
Of socks for her wee spotted calf—
The little rollicking rascal
Has never enough by half.
And Speckle is down by the willow
Washing her chicks in the lake,
While old Daddy Cockle is lying
Abed with a bad toothache.

PATTERS AND TATTERS

Patters had a gallant band,
An army made of clay.
But Tatters took the garden hose
And washed them all away.