SCENE I. Enfield Chase.
[Enter Blague, Smug, and Sir John.]
BLAGUE. Come, ye Hungarian pilchers, we are once more come under the zona torrida of the forest. Let's be resolute, let's fly to and again; and if the devil come, we'll put him to his Interrogatories, and not budge a foot. What? s'foot, I'll put fire into you, ye shall all three serve the good Duke of Norfolk.
SMUG. Mine host, my bully, my pretious consull, my noble Holofernes, I have been drunk i' thy house twenty times and ten, all's for that: I was last night in the third heavens, my brain was poor, it had yest in 't; but now I am a man of action; is 't not so, lad?
BANKS. Why, now thou hast two of the liberall sciences about thee, wit and reason, thou maist serve the Duke of Europe.
SMUG. I will serve the Duke of Christendom, and do him more credit in his celler then all the plate in his buttery; is 't not so, lad?
SIR JOHN. Mine host and Smug, stand there; Banks, you and your horse keep together; but lie close, shew no tricks, for fear of the keeper. If we be scared, we'll meet in the Church-porch at Enfield.
SMUG.
Content, sir John.
BANKS.
Smug, dost not thou remember the tree thou felst out of last
Night?
SMUG. Tush, and 't had been as high as the Abbey, I should nere have hurt my self; I have fallen into the river, coming home from Waltham, and scapt drowning.
SIR JOHN. Come, sever, fear no sprits! We'll have a Buck presently; we have watched later then this for a Doe, mine Host.
HOST.
Thou speakst as true as velvet.
SIR JOHN.
Why then, come! Grass and hay, etc.
[Exeunt.]
[Enter Clare, Jerningham, and Milliscent.]
CLARE.
Franke Jerningham!
JERNINGHAM.
Speak softly, rogue; how now?
CLARE. S'foot, we shall lose our way, it's so dark; whereabouts are we?
JERNINGHAM. Why, man, at Potters gate; the way lies right: hark! the clock strikes at Enfield; what's the hour?
CLARE.
Ten, the bell says.
JERNINGHAM.
A lies in's throat, it was but eight when we set out of
Chesson. Sir John and his Sexton are at ale to night, the
clock runs at random.
CLARE. Nay, as sure as thou liv'st, the villanous vicar is abroad in the chase this dark night: the stone Priest steals more venison then half the country.
JERNINGHAM.
Milliscent, how dost thou?
MILLISCENT.
Sir, very well.
I would to God we were at Brians lodge.
CLARE.
We shall anon; z'ounds, hark! What means this noise?
JERNINGHAM.
Stay, I hear horsemen.
CLARE.
I hear footmen too.
JERNINGHAM.
Nay, then I have it: we have been discovered,
And we are followed by our fathers men.
MILLISCENT.
Brother and friend, alas, what shall we do?
CLARE.
Sister, speak softly, or we are descried.
They are hard upon us, what so ere they be,
Shadow your self behind this brake of fern,
We'll get into the wood, and let them pass.
[Enter Sir John, Blague, Smug, and Banks, one after another.]
SIR JOHN. Grass and hay! we are all mortall; the keepers abroad, and there's an end.
BANKS.
Sir John!
SIR JOHN.
Neighbour Banks, what news?
BANKS.
Z'wounds, Sir John, the keepers are abroad; I was hard by 'am.
SIR JOHN.
Grass and hay! where's mine host Blague?
BLAGUE. Here, Metrapolitane. The philistines are upon us, be silent; let us serve the good Duke of Norfolk. But where is Smug?
SMUG. Here; a pox on ye all, dogs; I have kild the greatest Buck in Brians walk. Shift for your selves, all the keepers are up: let's meet in Enfield church porch; away, we are all taken else.
[Exeunt.]
[Enter Brian, with his man, and his hound.]
BRIAN.
Raph, hearst thou any stirring?
RAPH.
I heard one speak here hard by, in the bottom. Peace, Maister,
speak low; zownes, if I did not hear a bow go off, and the
Buck bray, I never heard deer in my life.
BRIAN.
When went your fellows out into their walks?
RAPH.
An hour ago.
BRIAN.
S'life, is there stealers abroad, and they cannot hear
Of them: where the devil are my men to night?
Sirra, go up the wind towards Buckleyes lodge.
I'll cast about the bottom with my hound,
And I will meet thee under Cony ocke.
RAPH.
I will, Sir.
BRIAN. How now? by the mass, my hound stays upon something; hark, hark, Bowman, hark, hark, there!
MILLISCENT.
Brother, Frank Jerningham, brother Clare!
BRIAN. Peace; that's a woman's voice! Stand! who's there? Stand, or I'll shoot.
MILLISCENT.
O Lord! hold your hands, I mean no harm, sir.
BRIAN.
Speak, who are you?
MILLISCENT.
I am a maid, sir; who? Master Brian?
BRIAN.
The very same; sure, I should know her voice;
Mistris Milliscent?
MILLISCENT.
Aye, it is I, sir.
BRIAN.
God for his passion! what make you here alone?
I lookd for you at my lodge an hour ago.
What means your company to leave you thus?
Who brought you hither?
MILLISCENT.
My brother, Sir, and Master Jerningham,
Who, hearing folks about us in the Chase,
Feard it had been sir Ralph and my father,
Who had pursude us, thus dispearsed our selves,
Till they were past us.
BRIAN.
But where be they?
MILLISCENT.
They be not far off, here about the grove.
[Enter Clare and Jerningham.]
CLARE.
Be not afraid, man, I heard Brian's tongue,
That's certain.
JERNINGHAM.
Call softly for your sister.
CLARE.
Milliscent!
MILLISCENT.
Aye, brother, here.
BRIAN.
Maister Clare!
CLARE.
I told you it was Brian.
BRIAN. Who's that? Maister Jerningham: you are a couple of hot-shots; does a man commit his wench to you, to put her to grass at this time of night
JERNINGHAM.
We heard a noise about her in the chase,
And fearing that our fathers had pursued us,
Severd our selves.
CLARE.
Brian, how hapd'st thou on her?
BRIAN.
Seeking for stealers are abroad to night,
My hound stayed on her, and so found her out.
CLARE.
They were these stealers that affrighted us;
I was hard upon them, when they horst their Deer,
And I perceive they took me for a keeper.
BRIAN.
Which way took they?
JERNINGHAM.
Towards Enfield.
BRIAN. A plague upon 't, that's that damned Priest, and Blague of the George, he that serves the good Duke of Norfolk.
[A noise within: Follow, follow, follow.]
CLARE.
Peace, that's my father's voice.
BRIAN.
Z'ownds, you suspected them, and now they are here indeed.
MILLISCENT.
Alas, what shall we do?
BRIAN.
If you go to the lodge, you are surely taken;
Strike down the wood to Enfield presently,
And if Mounchensey come, I'll send him t'yee.
Let me alone to bussle with your father;
I warrant you that I will keep them play
Till you have quit the chase; away, away!
[Exeunt all but Brian.]
Who's there?
[Enter the Knights.]
SIR RAPH.
In the king's name, pursue the Ravisher!
BRIAN.
Stand, or I'll shoot.
SIR ARTHUR.
Who's there?
BRIAN.
I am the keeper that do charge you stand;
You have stolen my Deer.
SIR ARTHUR.
We stolen thy Deer? we do pursue a thief.
BRIAN.
You are arrant thieves, and ye have stolen my Deer.
SIR RAPH.
We are Knights; Sir Arthur Clare, and Sir Raph Jerningham.
BRIAN.
The more your shame, that Knights should be such thieves.
SIR ARTHUR.
Who, and what art thou?
BRIAN.
My name is Brian, keeper of this walk.
SIR ARTHUR.
O Brian, a villain!
Thou hast received my daughter to thy lodge.
BRIAN.
You have stolen the best Deer in my walk to night. My Deer!
SIR ARTHUR.
My daughter!
Stop not my way!
BRIAN. What make you in my walk? you have stolen the best Buck in my walk to night.
SIR ARTHUR.
My daughter!
BRIAN.
My Deer!
SIR RAPH.
Where is Mountchensey?
BRIAN.
Where's my Buck?
SIR ARTHUR.
I will complain me of thee to the King.
BRIAN.
I'll complain unto the King you spoil his game:
Tis strange that men of your account and calling
Will offer it!
I tell you true, Sir Arthur and Sir Raph,
That none but you have only spoild my game.
SIR ARTHUR.
I charge you, stop us not!
BRIAN.
I charge you both ye get out of my ground!
Is this a time for such as you,
Men of your place and of your gravity,
To be abroad a thieving? tis a shame;
And, afore God, if I had shot at you,
I had served you well enough.
[Exeunt.]
SCENE II. Enfield Churchyard.
[Enter Banks the Miller, wet on his legs.]
BANKS. S'foot, here's a dark night indeed! I think I have been in fifteen ditches between this and the forest. Soft, here's Enfield Church: I am so wet with climing over into an orchard for to steal some filberts. Well, here I'll sit in the Church porch, and wait for the rest of my consort.
[Enter the Sexton.]
SEXTON. Here's a sky as black as Lucifer. God bless us! here was goodman Theophilus buried; he was the best Nutcracker that ever dwelt in Enfield. Well, tis 9. a clock, tis time to ring curfew. Lord bless us, what a white thing is that in the Church porch! O Lord, my legs are too weak for my body, my hair is too stiff for my night-cap, my heart fails; this is the ghost of Theophilus. O Lord, it follows me! I cannot say my prayers, and one would give me a thousand pound. Good spirit, I have bowled and drunk and followed the hounds with you a thousand times, though I have not the spirit now to deal with you. O Lord!
[Enter Priest.]
PRIEST.
Grass and hey, we are all mortall. Who's there?
SEXTON.
We are grass and hay indeed; I know you to be Master
Parson by your phrase.
PRIEST.
Sexton!
PRIEST.
I, sir.
PRIEST.
For mortalities sake, What's the matter?
SEXTON. O Lord, I am a man of another element; Master Theophilus Ghost is in the Church porch. There was a hundred Cats, all fire, dancing here even now, and they are clomb up to the top of the steeple; I'll not into the belfry for a world.
PRIEST. O good Salomon; I have been about a deed of darkness to night: O Lord, I saw fifteen spirits in the forest, like white bulls; if I lie, I am an arrant thief: mortality haunts us—grass and hay! the devils at our heels, and let's hence to the parsonage.
[Exeunt.]
[The Miller comes out very softly.]
MILLER. What noise was that? tis the watch, sure; that villanous unlucky rogue, Smug, is tain, upon my life; and then all our villeny comes out; I heard one cry, sure.
[Enter Host Blague.]
HOST. If I go steal any more venison, I am a Paradox: s'foot, I can scarce bear the sin of my flesh in the day, tis so heavy; if I turn not honest, and serve the good Duke of Norfolk, as true mareterraneum skinker should do, let me never look higher then the element of a Constable.
MILLER.
By the Lord, there are some watchmen; I hear them name
Maister Constable; I would to God my Mill were an Eunuch,
and wanted her stones, so I were hence.
HOST.
Who's there?
MILLER.
Tis the Constable, by this light; I'll steal hence, and if
I can meet mine host Blague, I'll tell him how Smug is
tain, and will him to look to himself.
[Exit.]
HOST. What the devil is that white thing? this same is a Church- yard, and I have heard that ghosts and villenous goblins have been seen here.
[Enter Sexton and Priest.]
PRIEST. Grass and hay! O, that I could conjure! we saw a spirit here in the Church-yard; and in the fallow field there's the devil with a man's body upon his back in a white sheet.
SEXTON.
It may be a woman's body, Sir John.
PRIEST. If she be a woman, the sheets damn her; Lord bless us, what a night of mortality is this!
HOST.
Priest!
PRIEST.
Mine host!
HOST.
Did you not see a spirit all in white cross you at the stile?
SEXTON. O no, mine host; but there sate one in the porch; I have not breath ynough left to bless me from the Devil.
HOST.
Who's that?
PRIEST.
The Sexton, almost frighted out of his wits. Did you see
Banks or Smug?
HOST. No, they are gone to Waltham, sure: I would fain hence; come, let's to my house: I'll ne'er serve the duke of Norfolk in this fashion again whilst I breath. If the devil be amongst us, tis time to hoist sail, and cry roomer. Keep together; Sexton, thou art secret, what? let's be comfortable one to Another.
PRIEST.
We are all mortal, mine host.
HOST.
True; and I'll serve God in the night hereafter afore the
Duke of Norfolk.
[Exeunt.]