The grave and thin-faced one who keeps the Bespoke Tailor's Shop,
And subjects his child to treatment of a most disagreeable nature,
Never goes into the Blue Lantern,
Never takes pellet of li-un or nut of areca,
Or communes with Black Smoke,
Or loses money at puckapoo,
Or makes public outcry or gesture
Expressive of delight in his friends,
Or does foolish and unworthy things,
Or makes exchange of hats with friends.

He has no friends, for he has no weaknesses.
While others fall to the simple follies of humanity
He walks ever upright and self-contained, devout and dignified,
And ill-treats his child at night.