ADVENTURES
of the
TEENIE WEENIES

By

WM. DONAHEY

ADVENTURES

of the

TEENIE WEENIES

BY

WILLIAM DONAHEY

Illustrated by

THE AUTHOR

The Reilly & Lee Co.

Chicago

THE TEENIE WEENIES

Who they are and where they live.

The Teenie Weenies are a very tiny little people. The Teenie Weenie children are about half an inch in height and the older Teenie Weenies are from two and a half to three inches tall. Paddy Pinn is the tallest one and he really is a Teenie Weenie giant, for he stands four inches in his stocking feet.

The little folks are so small that a lead pencil is to them a great log and a clothes pin will keep the tiny fire place burning for some time. A large tea cup would almost hold the entire family and they could go swimming all at once in a wash basin.

A potato will keep the Teenie Weenies supplied for several months, while one grain of rice will make one of the little people a square meal. Two baked lima beans will make a meal for the whole family and a thimbleful of butter will last a week.

The Teenie Weenies are so small that big people would hardly notice them and the little folks have to be careful to keep out of their way.

The Teenie Weenies live in an old shoe. They have built on a kitchen and a roof covers the top of the shoe. An old hat is used by the little people for a school house and quarters for the army. On top of the hat is a tiny bell which is used for a school bell and also as a fire alarm. On the second floor of the hat the army keeps its uniforms and guns and here the little soldiers drill one night every week.

The Teenie Weenies have many tiny tools and they store all these useful things in an old tin can. There is a work bench in the can and here the men make things and mend the furniture. The shoe house in which most of the Teenie Weenies live is quite crowded, so one corner of the tool house has been made into a comfortable home for Paddy Pinn and Gogo.

An old tea pot has been made into a laundry and here the Chinaman and Zip, the Teenie Weenie wild man, live and do the family washing each week. The little folks have made a cigar box into a wonderful hospital and there the Doctor lives.

Mr. and Mrs. Lover have their own home and live, with their two children, who are twins, in a baby shoe which has been made into a beautiful bungalow.

All of these tiny buildings are close to each other under a certain rose bush and there the little folks live happily together.

The Teenie Weenies ask that the place where they live shall not be told, as they are afraid curious folks might come around to see them. “Not that we wouldn’t like to have big people visit us,” they say, “but, you see, being so little we might get tramped on and that would be quite the end of us.”

INTRODUCING THE TEENIE WEENIES

The General is the head of the Teenie Weenie family. He is very kind and wise and all the little folks trust and love him.

The Doctor looks after the health of the Teenie Weenies, and he is often called to help sick birds, mice and squirrels, for his skill as a doctor is known for quite a distance about the rose bush. He has an office in the Teenie Weenie hospital, and there he is able to treat the sick Teenie Weenies in the best possible way.

The Teenie Weenie Cook is boss of the kitchen and he cooks the most wonderful food that any Teenie Weenie ever tasted. His stove is made out of an old tin tobacco can. The oven is so big that a whole stuffed prune can be baked in it.

Gogo, the little colored Teenie Weenie, is the assistant cook and he can get up almost as good a meal as the Cook. The General says that no one can bake a lima bean as well as Gogo.

The Dunce is a foolish fellow, who is always doing funny things. He is always hungry and the Cook says that he can eat a thimbleful of pudding and then get inside the thimble. All the Teenie Weenies love the Dunce, for he is a kind hearted little chap.

The Old Soldier has only one leg but he is a good carpenter and he can make beautiful furniture out of a few matches. He is also a good tailor and he knows how to mend shoes wonderfully.

The Lady of Fashion is the most beautiful Teenie Weenie lady. She dresses in the very latest style and makes many things with her tiny needle. She is house keeper at the shoe house and often helps the Doctor, for she is a good nurse.

The Policeman is a fat little fellow whose duty it is to walk about and look after the Teenie Weenie children. He settles disputes among the Teenie Weenies and chases away bugs that get too near to the Teenie Weenie houses.

Grandpa is the very oldest Teenie Weenie. He is crippled up with rheumatism and spends most of his time sitting in front of the Teenie Weenie fireplace.

The Chinaman looks after the Teenie Weenie washing. He lives in an old tea pot, which has been made into a fine laundry. The spout of the tea pot makes a good chimney, for the Chinaman must have a fire most of the time, as he needs hot water to wash the clothes and also a place to heat his tiny irons.

Zip is the Teenie Weenie wild man. He came from a tribe of tiny wild men to live with the Teenie Weenies. He rooms with the Chinaman and helps with the washing.

The Cowboy is a great mouse-back rider; in fact he can ride most anything. He once rode a bucking grass hopper but he said it was pretty hard work. He can throw the lasso with wonderful skill and he is a good hunter.

The Indian is a silent little fellow. He spends much of his time in the woods and he can follow the trail of a caterpillar in the wildest jungle of tall grass.

The Scotchman is quite a musical Teenie Weenie. He plays the bagpipes and dances many fancy steps.

The Sailor is a great swimmer and knows all about boats.

The Turk is very strong. He can lift a thimble full of water above his head and he can carry a lead pencil on his shoulder. He knows a great deal about machinery, too.

Rufus Rhyme is the Teenie Weenie poet, who writes verse and songs for the rest of the Teenie Weenies to sing.

Paddy Pinn is the tallest Teenie Weenie and he is a very jolly and wise man.

The Clown is a happy-go-lucky fellow, who can walk on his hands and tumble as well as an acrobat. He loves to play jokes and the Dunce is his great chum.

Tessie Bone is the newest Teenie Weenie. She joined the Teenie Weenie family not long ago and all the little people are very fond of her, in spite of the fact that she is quite a tomboy.

There are several Teenie Weenie women and children and all these little people live very contentedly in their tiny houses under the rose bush.

All the Teenie Weenies must do their share of the work. If you don’t work you can’t eat, is their motto and the work is usually done, for all the little folks have good appetites.

Every day some Teenie Weenie has to help the Cook and Gogo wash up the dishes and the next day he has to help the Lady of Fashion make the beds and sweep up the house, while on another day he must help cut wood for the stoves and the fireplaces.

With all the Teenie Weenies helping it does not take a great while to do the work, so the little people have most of the day to spend as they like.

The Teenie Weenies are always ready to help a friend in need and many times they have helped the squirrels, the birds, the rabbits and the mice, who live near the rose bush.

Every summer the little people plant a garden and raise many vegetables which they store away in a great cellar under a tiny hill near the shoe house.

Each fall the Cook makes delicious jelly and apple butter and puts up many cans of fruit and vegetables for use during the long winter. The little people smoke many fish and frog hams too.

Four potatoes will keep the Teenie Weenie family supplied all winter and when the Cook wants some potatoes for a meal he goes into the cellar and cuts off a piece. He then covers the place on the potato where he has cut out the piece with hot paraffine and in this manner he keeps the potato in good shape until it is used up.

Apples, carrots, and beets are kept in the same way, so you see the Teenie Weenies have plenty to eat during the winter.

In the summer they live on fresh fruit and vegetables from their garden, while once a week they buy a fresh minnow from a friendly King Fisher for a fish dinner. Occasionally they buy an egg from an old hen, which keeps them supplied with food for a long time, but the Teenie Weenies don’t have eggs often, for they are expensive, as the old hens demand twenty-five grains of corn for each egg.

“Mother Bunch Drinks a Toast”–[See Page 126].

THE EASTER EGG

Humpty Dumpty sat on a hill,

Humpty Dumpty had a great spill;

All the Teenies, ladies and men,

Can’t put Humpty Dumpty together again.

—Rufus Rhyme, Teenie Weenie Poet.

“WELL, madam,” said the General, lifting his hat and bowing politely to the old hen who lived near the shoe house, “will it be possible for you to furnish the Teenie Weenies with an egg for their Easter dinner this year?”

“Why, yes, of course,” snapped the old hen. “Ain’t I always ready to lay an egg when I gets my pay?”

“Dear me,” whispered the Lady of Fashion to the Doctor, “did you ever in all your life hear such bad grammar?”

“How much will you charge us?” asked the General, as he sat down on a pebble.

“Twenty-five grains of corn,” answered the hen, glaring about at the Teenie Weenies.

“Great guns!” exclaimed the General, “why, that’s five bags, and last year we paid you only three.”

“Things are awfully high now and worms are scarce; well, all right, you can have an egg for twenty grains of corn, and not one grain less,” cried the old hen.

“That’s pretty expensive,” said the General, “but it wouldn’t seem like Easter if we didn’t have a boiled egg, so I’ll take it and we’ll bring over the corn in the morning and get the egg.”

The next morning the little folks filled four teenie weenie bags with corn. Five grains were put into each bag and it was about all a Teenie Weenie could do to carry it.

When the Teenie Weenies arrived at the hen’s house they opened the bags and poured the corn out on the ground so the old hen could count them, for she was a businesslike old lady and wanted to be sure that she was getting her full amount of corn.

“I’m not afraid you’ll cheat me,” she said, “but any one is liable to make a mistake and I always believe in being careful in a business deal.”

“That’s right, that’s right,” said a big rooster with a huge double chin, who strutted up to the hen house. “You can’t be too careful when it’s a matter of business.”

“How are you going to get the egg home?” asked the old hen.

“Oh we can roll it very nicely,” answered the General.

“Well, I was just going to say that I couldn’t deliver it at the low price of twenty grains of corn,” cackled the hen. “Give me ten grains more and I’ll walk over to the shoe house and lay it anywhere you say.”

“It isn’t far and we can roll it easily,” answered the General.

“Well clear out and give me a little time and I’ll lay the egg for you,” said the hen. “You don’t think I can lay an egg with all you folks standin’ around here starin’, do you?”

The Teenie Weenies retired to the other end of the chicken yard, where they sat down on several corn cobs to wait.

Presently the old hen announced the laying of the egg with loud cackles and the little folks started at once to roll the egg home.

It was easy work rolling the egg over the level ground, but when the Teenie Weenies came to a steep hill that lay in their path they found that it would be necessary to use ropes in order to let it down safely. The little fellows rolled the egg up to the edge of the hill, while the Turk made the ropes ready to handle the heavy load.

Suddenly a puff of wind struck the egg and it rolled over the edge of the hill. The Cook and Gogo tried to catch it, but they were too late, and the egg and the two Teenie Weenies tumbled down the hill. The Policeman, who was standing below, just had time to fall out of the way as the egg and the Cook rolled past him and smashed up against an old birch.

The Cook was able to save a great deal of the broken egg, which he dipped up into many wash tubs and thimbles. The Teenie Weenies went to bed that night with heavy hearts, for they knew that it would be quite impossible to buy another egg at such high prices.

Easter morning Shoehurst was filled with the greatest excitement, for on the ground in front of the house lay a fine big egg. Most of the Teenie Weenies thought the Easter rabbit had left the egg, but they were greatly mistaken, for the old hen, who was really a kind-hearted old lady in spite of her gruff manner, had heard of the broken egg and, feeling sorry for the little people, had slipped over early in the morning and laid the egg herself.

THE RAIN CAME DOWN BY THE THIMBLEFUL

WHEN Zip, the little wild man, came to live with the Teenie Weenies there wasn’t a bit of room left in the old shoe house, so the kind hearted Chinaman took the little chap into his tea pot laundry. There was plenty of room in the old tea pot, so here the two little fellows lived in great comfort and Zip paid for his board by helping the Chinaman launder the Teenie Weenie clothes.

Zip and the Chinaman had eaten a great deal of the easter egg and being tired and sleepy they had retired quite early. While the little chaps lay dreaming in their tiny beds, a great storm came up and the big rain drops came down by the thimbleful. The little men were awakened by the roar of the rain drops splashing on the roof, but they merely turned over in their beds and went to sleep again, for why should they worry about the storm when they were sheltered in a strong tea pot?

Presently the Chinaman was awakened by a queer bouncing of his bed, and to his great astonishment he found that he was floating about the room. The frightened Chinaman sat straight up, and as he did so he lost his balance and tumbled kersplash into the water. He quickly jumped to his feet and found that the water was just up to his waist. Next he groped about the room for some Teenie Weenie matches and in a few minutes he lit a tiny candle.

A wonderful sight met the little fellow’s eyes, for all about the room chairs, tables, and things floated in great confusion. Zip lay snoring on his bed, which floated about, and the Chinaman had to shake him hard before he could be awakened.

“Zippie! Zippie! klick! klick!” shouted the Chinaman. “Wake up klick! Oh, suchee muchee wet.”

Poor Zip was scared half out of his wits when he looked about the room and it didn’t take the two Teenie Weenies long to grab a few clothes and scramble up onto the roof, for the water was almost up to their necks and was rising fast. The rain had stopped, but it was pitch dark, so the little fellows could do nothing but put on their clothes and wait for daylight.

The rest of the Teenie Weenie houses were not injured by the heavy rain, for they stood on the high ground and the water ran off down the hill into the little hollow in which the tea pot stood. The laundry was entirely surrounded by water, which was fully fourteen Teenie Weenie feet deep, and as neither of the little men dared swim among the floating sticks, they were forced to wait until help arrived.

Shortly after daylight the Chinaman and Zip were discovered sitting on top of the tea pot and in a short time the Teenie Weenies came to their rescue. They made a raft out of a couple of clothes pins, an old lead pencil and some boards. Gogo and the Turk pushed the raft through the floating rubbish about the tea pot and soon landed the Chinaman and Zip on dry land.

“J-J-J-Jimminie fish hooks!” exclaimed the Dunce, who was much excited over the rescue. “When I-I-Ig-g-go to bed to-night I’m goin’ to take a c-c-c-cork with me for a life preserver.”

“Allee same me savee irons,” cried the Chinaman, who had brought two of his flat irons through the flood.

“It’s a mighty good thing you held onto those irons,” laughed the Clown. “They might have floated away.”

The ground around the laundry was a sight when the water finally settled, for the Teenie Weenie wood pile was quite near and pencils, matches, and many sticks lay scattered all over the ground.

The Teenie Weenies carried eight thimblefuls of mud out of the tea pot and in a short time the little folks had the laundry as clean as a billiard ball, for every one of the little people helped with all his might.

GOGO AND THE COOK RUN ACROSS AN EARLY BIRD

A FEW days after the big flood, Gogo and the Cook washed up the breakfast dishes, cleaned the kitchen and set out in search of a mushroom for lunch.

“There’s some powerful big fat ones over in de big field,” remarked Gogo. “Why dere was one we all saw one day what was so big that fo’ of us done stand under it while it was rainin’ and nevah a single drop done touch us.”

“Listen,” whispered the Cook as the little fellows were making their way through some tall grass, “what in the name of goodness is that awful noise?”

“Sounds powerful funny like,” answered Gogo. “Suppose we go through the weeds and see what it is.” The two Teenie Weenies pushed their way quietly through the thick weeds and soon they saw a sight which made them laugh. A young robin stood at the side of a freshly spaded flower bed, and in his beak he held one end of a big, fat worm. The other end of the worm was fast in a piece of earth and the robin, with his feet braced, was holding on to the worm with all his might. The robin was gurgling and trying to call for help through his half closed beak, and the two Teenie Weenies quickly saw he needed help if he wished to save the worm.

“Hold on tight!” shouted the Cook, running up to the bird, “and we’ll get a pick and dig this old worm out for you.”

The bird nodded his head, while the two little chaps hurried over to the shoe house, where they secured a pick and shouted to the rest of the Teenie Weenies to follow.

The Turk caught hold of the bird’s tail and helped him hold on to the worm, while the Dunce pushed on the robin’s chest with all his strength. Gogo soon broke the piece of earth up with the pick and with one gulp the robin swallowed the worm.

“Whee!” exclaimed the bird, as he moved his head around to ease the stiffened muscles. “That was some hard job. I haven’t worked as hard as that for my breakfast for a long time.

“I saw that worm and I grabbed onto him, but he was a strong old fellow, for he certainly did hang onto that piece of earth with a powerful grip. I hung right onto him, for I hadn’t had a worm for several days, and I made up my mind I’d have him if I had to hold on all day.”

“Well, you certainly got him, all right!” laughed the Policeman.

“You bet I did, thanks to your help,” grinned the bird.

“How would you all like to hear a verse?” said the Poet, who had been writing on a piece of tiny paper while the Teenie Weenies had been helping the bird to get the worm.

“We’d like to hear it!” shouted the Teenie Weenies.

“This verse is entitled ‘Would You,’” said the Poet, as he stepped onto a piece of earth in full view of the little people:

“I’d love to be a little bird and hop about the trees,

And aeroplane above the land and fly across the seas.

I wouldn’t like to eat the things that little birdies do,

For I don’t care a bit for worms, now honestly, do you?”

THE DUNCE PICKS A SOFT PLACE TO FALL

EVERY Sunday afternoon, when the weather was pleasant, the Teenie Weenies took a long walk. “It’s good for your health,” the General told them, “and, besides, it’s a good way to put in the Sabbath afternoon.”

One Sunday while they were out on their walk they stopped near a house to chat a bit with a couple of sparrows, and as the little party talked the General happened to see the Dunce crawl up a vine onto a window sill and disappear through the open window.

“Mr. Policeman,” said the General, “I wish you would follow that foolish Dunce and see what he is up to.”

The Policeman quickly followed the Dunce through the window, but presently he appeared on the sill and motioned the General to come up. The General climbed the vine, followed by the rest of the Teenie Weenies, and crossing over to the inside of the window sill he saw a most alarming thing. Right below him stood a table and on the table stood the Dunce, almost knee deep in a piece of custard pie.

“Well, sir,” cried the General sternly, while the rest of the Teenie Weenies tried to keep from laughing, “haven’t I told you not to meddle with things when you go into people’s houses? What do you mean by disobeying me this way?”

“J-J-J-Just a minute, G-G-G-General, and I’ll explain,” shouted the Dunce, waving his dripping hands at the General. “It’s all an accident, you see, and this is the way it-it-it all happened. While you all were down there talking to those sparrows I happened to see this window was open and I thought I’d climb down here on the table, and j-j-just then I-I-I-somethin’ told me I-I-I was about to have a fall, and—and as long as I had to have a fall I thought I might just as well fall into the pie. You see, it being a custard pie, I knew that it was s-s-soft, and, of course I wanted to fall onto somethin’ soft. Why, it almost scares me to death when I stop to think that if that pie had been an apple pie, with a-a-a hard crust on it, I might have broken an arm or somethin’.

“Well when I found I was goin’ to fall I stepped up to the edge of the window sill, just above the pie, for I wanted to fall into something soft. When I landed in the pie I made up my mind that it wouldn’t hurt anything if I took a bite, so I-I-I-I took a lick or two.”

“Well, sir,” said the General, “I have a feeling that I’m going to fall, and I believe that as long as I’ve got to fall it might as well be on you.”

“Wh-wh-what do you mean, General?” asked the frightened Dunce.

“I mean, sir,” growled the General, “that I saw a toothpick outside on the ground, and I’m going to get it and give you a much deserved whipping.”

The Dunce slowly crawled out of the pie, climbed to the window sill and followed the General down the vine to the ground.

The General picked up half a tooth pick, which lay on the ground, and taking the naughty fellow by the arm he led him back of an old tin bucket.

“Now sir,” said the General sadly. “This is going to hurt me more than it will hurt you.”

“I-I-I’ll t-t-trade places with you, G-G-General,” stuttered the Dunce.

The General was a most kind hearted little man and he seldom used the switch, but the Dunce had been warned many times to keep from meddling, and he had to be punished.

He struck the Dunce several times very lightly across his teenie weenie legs and the little chap yelled as though he was being killed.

It didn’t hurt the Dunce a bit and he simply yelled because he was frightened, but it did him a great deal of good, for he behaved himself for a long time, which goes to show that even a Teenie Weenie needs a teenie weenie bit of punishment once in a while.

HELP! POLICEMANS!

“THUNDERIN’ SNAILS!” exclaimed Paddy Pinn, shortly after the little folks had helped the robin get his breakfast, as he picked up one of the tiny garden hoes the Teenie Weenies use. “I’d bust this hoe with one dig, that’s what I’d do,” and the big fellow burst out in a loud laugh.

“Well, that’s the best we’ve got to offer you,” said the Old Soldier.

“I’ll make one for myself before a grasshopper can shake his left hind foot, that’s what I’ll do,” cried Paddy, and he ran off towards the rose bush under which the Teenie Weenies lived. In a few minutes he returned with a big thorn, which he had cut from a dead brier, and, using a match for a handle, he made a fine hoe by tying the thorn to the match.

“There!” he exclaimed holding it up. “That’s what I call a man’s sized hoe, that’s what I do.”

The little people set out for the garden, as the General had ordered them to hoe the lima beans. A number of seeds had been planted, for the Teenie Weenies were fond of lima beans and they usually had to store away about two hundred and fifty beans to last them through the winter.

“It will take quite a few more beans this winter,” said the General, “for our family is larger now.”

“Why the Dunce can eat twenty himself,” laughed the Cook.

“You bet I could,” cried the Dunce, who was always hungry. “I could eat a whole lima bean right this minute.”

“Why you couldn’t eat half a bean at once,” said the Old Soldier.

“Well, I bet a grape seed I could eat a third of a bean, anyhow,” answered the Dunce.

The Teenie Weenie garden was hidden away where grown-up people would not be likely to tramp on the plants and as the little folks trudged along Gogo struck up the following song, while all the rest joined in the chorus:

“Beans they take the place of meat,

And so if we all wish to eat,

We must take our rake and hoe

And scratch the earth to make ’em grow.

CHORUS

“Hoe, hoe, rake and hoe!

Digging up and down the row.

Hoe, hoe, rake and hoe!

If you want to see them grow.”

The Teenie Weenies soon arrived at the garden and they set to work at once, still singing the little song and keeping time with the music as their tiny hoes struck the ground.

The Lady of Fashion helped with the work, but she was very careful not to soil her new garden suit, especially her tiny boots, which were made out of the finest frog leather.

“Listen!” said the Old Soldier, “I thought I he—” But he did not finish the sentence, for loud screams came from the tall grass back of the garden.

“Helpee! Helpee! Policemans, policemans!” came a voice, and suddenly the frightened Chinaman burst into sight with the most alarming speed.

Hanging onto his shirt tail was a big fat pinching-bug and the scared Chinaman was only touching the ground about every six inches.

Paddy Pinn struck the bug on the head with his huge hoe, as the Chinaman went by, and it rolled over on the ground half stunned by the mighty blow.

“Where did you pick up your friend,” asked the General, as he watched the bug scurry away through the tall grass.

“Me no pickee him up,” gasped the Chinaman. “Allee same he pick me up. Me sit down under bush to rest and me go sleepee. Me wakee up much klick and, whillikers, me see blig plinch bug and me run, but he catchee to shirtee tail and me runnee like glasshopper!”

“I should say you did run like a grasshopper,” laughed the Cowboy.

“Allee same you run like glasshopper, too,” glared the Chinaman, “if blig plinchin’-bug was hangin’ on your shirtee tail.”

FUZZY-WUZZY

THE Dunce teased the Chinaman a great deal after his experience with the pinching-bug, but the little fellow took it in good humor.

“Allee same me havee chance to laughee at you sometime maybe,” said the Chinaman. “Me no get mad but me likee chance to laugh at you.”

“All right Chink,” laughed the Dunce, “if I ever get a pinchin’-bug on my shirt tail you can laugh yourself sore.”

“Well me waitee; maybe time come when me allee same laughee,” said the Chinaman.

The Chinaman’s chance came sooner than he expected. Every Sunday afternoon the Teenie Weenies took a long walk, for it was healthful to walk in the fresh air, and besides it made them hungry for the fine dinner which the Cook always prepared.

One Sunday during their walk the little people stopped to pay a short call on an old hen and her chickens who lived some little distance from the shoe house. After chatting with the hen and her children for some time the little people continued their walk through a big open field where they finally sat down to rest on a soft, mossy bank.

“Where’s the Dunce?” asked the General, as he sat down beside the Lady of Fashion.

“I haven’t seen him since we left the old hen,” answered the little lady.

“He’s back there teasing those chickens,” announced Gogo. “I told him he’d better look out, or the first thing he knew he’d get a powerful good peckin’, for one of them fuzzy chickens looked mighty mad, that’s what she did.”

“It would just serve him right,” laughed the General. “And maybe it would teach him a lesson—”

“H-e-l-p! H-e-l-p!” came a voice from over a bank of earth, and suddenly the Dunce dashed into view followed by a very angry young chicken. The frightened Dunce was covering the ground in great leaps, and just as he ran into the midst of the startled Teenie Weenies the chicken overtook him.

“There, you little rascal!” shouted the chicken, giving the Dunce a peck with her beak which sent the little chap sprawling in the dirt.

“What’s the trouble?” asked the General, jumping to his feet.

“He was callin’ me ‘fuzzy-wuzzy’ and throwing things at me—that’s what he was,” said the chicken, “and I stood it just as long as I could and I chased him, that’s what I did, and I’ll do it again, too, if he ever teases me again.”

“You did exactly the right thing,” said the General, “and I hope this will be a lesson to him.”

“I suppose I shouldn’t have lost my temper, but I couldn’t stand it another minute,” said the chicken as she trotted away in the direction of her home.

“J-J-J-Jimminie C-C-C-Christmas!” exclaimed the Dunce, “but that fool chicken gave me an awful wallop.”

That night there was a big black and blue spot on the Dunce’s back and the Doctor had to rub it with salve, but it really did the foolish fellow a lot of good, for he has done no teasing since.

THE CHINAMAN ASKS FOR A CISTERN

“WELL Chink, what can I do for you this morning?” asked the General, as the Chinaman took off his hat and stepped into the Teenie Weenie library.

“Allee same me gottee flavor me want to ask,” said the little fellow.

“Sit down, sir, and tell me what it is,” smiled the General, pushing a tiny chair towards the Chinaman.

“Well,” said the Chinaman, “me gottee lot of washie allee time and me use lottee water.”

“Yes, I imagine you use a lot of water.”

“Oh yes!” exclaimed the Chinaman. “Me use muchee much. Sometimes me use ten, twenty, twenty-three thimblefuls when me have bigwash. Me likee water from roof, it muchee much better to washee clothes in, but when the rain he no come down me have to carry water from cleek and that long way to carry wash water.”

“Yes it is,” agreed the General, “and we will have to build a cistern so you can have all the water you need without having to carry it so far.”

“Yes me wantee clistern; me need clistern and me likee vlery much to have clistern.”

“You shall have a cistern. I’ll give orders for one to be built right away,” said the General.

The General went out in search of the Old Soldier, who was cutting some matches up for fire wood, and the two Teenie Weenies discussed the matter of a cistern for some time.

“We ought to have a good big cistern,” said the Old Soldier, “and I believe that we could make a good one by sinking a tin can in the ground.”

After a great deal of talk about the matter the little men decided to build the cistern as near the center of the little village as possible.

“You see,” said the Old Soldier, “if we build it at some central point we won’t have to lay so many pipes, and we will be able to catch all the water from most of the roofs.”

The next morning the little people went to work, and, while several of the Teenie Weenies dug a deep hole near the shoe house, the rest went out in search of a tin can to fill the hole.

On an ash heap not far away they found an old tin can and after a great deal of labor the little folks rolled it up to the hole. When the hole had been dug deep enough the Teenie Weenies rolled it in and then filled the earth in around the edges, so that when the work was done only the top could be seen.

The Teenie Weenies used dried hollow reeds for water pipes and when they had been painted thoroughly with a water proof paint, which the Old Soldier boiled up in a thimble, they carried the water nicely.

The pipes were connected up with the spouting from the tiny roofs and laid in trenches to the cistern. The top of the can was cut off and a tight fitting cover was put on. A little door was left in the top of the cover, so a bucket could be lowered and water drawn up when it was needed. A bucket made out of a hazel nut was used for the purpose, and it took three buckets full to fill a thimble.

“Now allee we need is a rain,” cried the Chinaman, when the work was finished. “And me hope it rainee like everythings to-night.”

“Well you may have your wish, Chink,” said the Sailor, looking up at the sky. “It sort of looks like we may have a shower to-night.”

The Sailor was right. It did rain that night and it rained hard.

The Chinaman was up at daylight to see whether the cistern had been filled, and to the great joy of the little chap he found it full to the very top.

THE DOCTOR SAVES A BIRD

“DOCTOR!” shouted the Dunce one morning, as he popped his head into the library, “t-t-there’s a b-b-bird outs-s-side who wants to s-s-see you.”

“All right,” answered the Doctor, “tell him I’ll be out in a minute.”

“I think he’s a her,” said the Dunce, “but anyhow she’s awfully excited and I think something terrible must have happened.”

The Doctor stepped out onto the Teenie Weenie front porch, and before the house he saw a bird in the act of shaking a tear off the end of her bill.

“Well, madam,” said the Doctor, “what can I do for you?”

“Oh, Doctor,” cried the bird, “please save my baby! I have lost two babies in the last month and please, oh, please, save my last baby for me.”

“Be calm, my dear lady,” said the Doctor, “and tell me all about the case.”

“Well,” began the mother, “I had three lovely babies this spring and about six weeks ago two of them were taken suddenly ill. I did everything I could for them, but they both died and only last night my last baby was taken sick. A squirrel, who lives in a tree near my nest, told me about you and I decided to come to you for help.”

“I’ll get my medicine case and join you in a minute,” said the Doctor, and running into the tiny house he soon returned.

“Jump right onto my back,” said the bird, “and I’ll take you to my baby in a jiffy.”

The Doctor climbed onto the bird’s back and in another minute he found himself sailing over the tops of the trees so fast he could scarcely breathe. In a few minutes the bird landed on a bush and quickly hopped to a pretty nest hidden beneath the green leaves. The Doctor slid off into the nest, where he found a young and very sick bird.

“Let’s see your tongue,” said the Doctor, but the poor bird was so sick he could hardly open his mouth and the Doctor was forced to take hold of his beak and help. Next the Doctor examined the bird’s eyes and felt his pulse.

“What has the patient been eating lately?” asked the Doctor.

“I have given him only the nicest and fattest bugs and worms I could find,” answered the mother.

“Madam,” said the Doctor, “your baby is a very sick boy, but I think I can save his life if you will follow my advice.”

“I’ll do anything to save my boy,” cried the poor mother.

“First,” said the Doctor, “the patient must not have much to eat. He will have to have a special diet, which the Teenie Weenie Cook will prepare for him. The patient must be kept dry at all costs,” continued the Doctor.

“I never leave the nest when it’s raining,” cried the mother bird, “and I keep him just as dry as can be.”

“You keep the rain off your child, no doubt,” said the Doctor, “but the nest gets wet and it must be kept dry too.”

The bird carried the Doctor back to the shoe house, where he soon made arrangements for taking care of the sick child.

The Teenie Weenies carried boards over to the tree and pulled them up to the nest with ropes and pulleys. They built a strong frame work over the nest and roofed it with card-board, which was given several coats of water proof paint.

“This roof will keep the nest dry,” said the Doctor, when the work had been done, “and that is a most important matter.”

The Cook made angle-worm broth for the sick bird and he cooked corn and rice in such a delicious way that the poor patient soon began to improve. At the end of a week the bird was much better and three weeks later he was entirely cured.

FRIDAY THE THIRTEENTH

“DO YOU all know what day this is?” asked Gogo, as he stopped at the laundry door and looked mournfully in at the Chinaman, who was singing loudly as he rubbed a tiny shirt up and down his wash board.

“Why allee same it Fliday,” answered the Chinaman. “Yes sir,” said the little colored Teenie Weenie sadly, “it’s mo’ than just Friday. It’s Friday the thirteenth.”

“Allee same what difference?” asked the Chinaman.

“When Friday comes on the thirteenth of the month it’s mighty unlucky,” answered Gogo, with a most serious expression on his black little face. “You all better look out, ’cause somethin’ always happens that is powerful unlucky on a day like this.”

“Nothing happen unlucky to me,” cried the Chinaman. “Me vely happy. Me gottee clistern full of water and me gottee lottee wash to do, so me too busy to be unlucky,” and the little chap began washing all the harder.

“Well just you remembah that I-all told you it was unlucky. I just wanted to wa’n you, dat’s all,” and Gogo mournfully made his way to the Lovers’ bungalow, where he left much advice to Mr. and Mrs. Lover.

Gogo spent most of the morning explaining that it was Friday the thirteenth, and he warned each and every Teenie Weenie that it was a most unlucky day.

“Well Gogo,” said the General, when the little people sat down to their noonday meal, “has anything unlucky happened yet?”

“No sir, not yet,” answered the little fellow, “but there’s plenty of time yet for somethin’ to happen. Just you wait and see.”

“General,” said the Cook, popping his head through the kitchen door, “there isn’t a bit of sugar in the house. Every last speck has been used and we haven’t a grain.”

“Great pinhead!” exclaimed the General, “that’s terrible. We can’t get along without sugar.”

“Didn’t I-all tell you dat this was a unlucky day,” cried Gogo, looking around at his friends.

“Well it certainly is unlucky if we haven’t any sugar in the house,” cried the Dunce, who had a large sweet tooth.

“After dinner I’ll see what we can do, Cook,” said the General. “We certainly must have some sugar.”

The Teenie Weenies made their own sugar from the sap of the maple tree, or from the blossoms of sweet clover, but the frost had stopped the flow of the maple sap and the little folks had only been able to make a small amount of sugar.

“It will be quite a spell before we can make sugar out of the sweet clover blossoms,” said the Old Soldier, “and we will have to get sugar some other way.”

That afternoon the General ordered the Teenie Weenies to go out in search of sugar. “But mind,” warned the General, “I don’t want any one to take sugar from the big houses unless you see that it is going to waste.”

All afternoon the little people searched about the big house, but not one bit of sugar could they find, and as it was growing dark, it began to look as though the Teenie Weenie sugar bowl would be empty that night at supper.

“Dat’s all on account of Friday the thirteenth,” moaned Gogo. “Dis is suttinly a most unlucky day.”

“G-G-General, G-G-G-General,” gasped the Dunce as he dashed into the Teenie Weenie sitting room, “Jimminie f-f-f-fishhooks! I found a great big lot of sugar!”

“Where?” asked the excited Teenie Weenies.

“Well,” said the Dunce, “I was hurrying along the walk over by the big fence and I saw a little boy stub his toe and fall down. When he got up and went away I went over where he had fallen and I found a bag of sugar. He dropped it when he fell and it was spilled over the sidewalk.”

“Didn’t he try and pick it up?” asked the Doctor.

“N-N-N-No,” answered the Dunce. “He just got up and went on his way.”

“Well we certainly can’t let that sugar lie there and spoil,” smiled the General, and he ordered the Teenie Weenies to rescue as much of the sugar as possible.