The Two Gentlemen of Verona
Actus primus, Scena prima.
Valentine: Protheus, and Speed.
Valentine. Cease to perswade, my louing Protheus;
Home-keeping youth, haue euer homely wits,
Wer't not affection chaines thy tender dayes
To the sweet glaunces of thy honour'd Loue,
I rather would entreat thy company,
To see the wonders of the world abroad,
Then (liuing dully sluggardiz'd at home)
Weare out thy youth with shapelesse idlenesse.
But since thou lou'st; loue still, and thriue therein,
Euen as I would, when I to loue begin
Pro. Wilt thou be gone? Sweet Valentine adew,
Thinke on thy Protheus, when thou (hap'ly) seest
Some rare note-worthy obiect in thy trauaile.
Wish me partaker in thy happinesse,
When thou do'st meet good hap; and in thy danger,
(If euer danger doe enuiron thee)
Commend thy grieuance to my holy prayers,
For I will be thy beades-man, Valentine
Val. And on a loue-booke pray for my successe?
Pro. Vpon some booke I loue, I'le pray for thee
Val. That's on some shallow Storie of deepe loue,
How yong Leander crost the Hellespont
Pro. That's a deepe Storie, of a deeper loue,
For he was more then ouer-shooes in loue
Val. 'Tis true; for you are ouer-bootes in loue,
And yet you neuer swom the Hellespont
Pro. Ouer the Bootes? nay giue me not the Boots
Val. No, I will not; for it boots thee not
Pro. What?
Val. To be in loue; where scorne is bought with grones:
Coy looks, with hart-sore sighes: one fading moments mirth,
With twenty watchfull, weary, tedious nights;
If hap'ly won, perhaps a haplesse gaine;
If lost, why then a grieuous labour won;
How euer: but a folly bought with wit,
Or else a wit, by folly vanquished
Pro. So, by your circumstance, you call me foole
Val. So, by your circumstance, I feare you'll proue
Pro. 'Tis Loue you cauill at, I am not Loue
Val. Loue is your master, for he masters you;
And he that is so yoked by a foole,
Me thinkes should not be chronicled for wise
Pro. Yet Writers say; as in the sweetest Bud,
The eating Canker dwels; so eating Loue
Inhabits in the finest wits of all
Val. And Writers say; as the most forward Bud
Is eaten by the Canker ere it blow,
Euen so by Loue, the yong, and tender wit
Is turn'd to folly, blasting in the Bud,
Loosing his verdure, euen in the prime,
And all the faire effects of future hopes.
But wherefore waste I time to counsaile thee
That art a votary to fond desire?
Once more adieu: my Father at the Road
Expects my comming, there to see me ship'd
Pro. And thither will I bring thee Valentine
Val. Sweet Protheus, no: Now let vs take our leaue:
To Millaine let me heare from thee by Letters
Of thy successe in loue; and what newes else
Betideth here in absence of thy Friend:
And I likewise will visite thee with mine
Pro. All happinesse bechance to thee in Millaine
Val. As much to you at home: and so farewell.
Enter
Pro. He after Honour hunts, I after Loue;
He leaues his friends, to dignifie them more;
I loue my selfe, my friends, and all for loue:
Thou Iulia, thou hast metamorphis'd me:
Made me neglect my Studies, loose my time;
Warre with good counsaile; set the world at nought;
Made Wit with musing, weake; hart sick with thought
Sp. Sir Protheus: 'saue you: saw you my Master?
Pro. But now he parted hence to embarque for Millain
Sp. Twenty to one then, he is ship'd already,
And I haue plaid the Sheepe in loosing him
Pro. Indeede a Sheepe doth very often stray,
And if the Shepheard be awhile away
Sp. You conclude that my Master is a Shepheard then,
and I Sheepe?
Pro. I doe
Sp. Why then my hornes are his hornes, whether I wake or sleepe
Pro. A silly answere, and fitting well a Sheepe
Sp. This proues me still a Sheepe
Pro. True: and thy Master a Shepheard
Sp. Nay, that I can deny by a circumstance
Pro. It shall goe hard but ile proue it by another
Sp. The Shepheard seekes the Sheepe, and not the
Sheepe the Shepheard; but I seeke my Master, and my
Master seekes not me: therefore I am no Sheepe
Pro. The Sheepe for fodder follow the Shepheard, the Shepheard for foode followes not the Sheepe: thou for wages followest thy Master, thy Master for wages followes not thee: therefore thou art a Sheepe
Sp. Such another proofe will make me cry baa
Pro. But do'st thou heare: gau'st thou my Letter to Iulia?
Sp. I Sir: I (a lost-Mutton) gaue your Letter to her (a lac'd-Mutton) and she (a lac'd-Mutton) gaue mee (a lost-Mutton) nothing for my labour
Pro. Here's too small a Pasture for such store of
Muttons
Sp. If the ground be ouer-charg'd, you were best
sticke her
Pro. Nay, in that you are astray: 'twere best pound
you
Sp. Nay Sir, lesse then a pound shall serue me for carrying
your Letter
Pro. You mistake; I meane the pound, a Pinfold
Sp. From a pound to a pin? fold it ouer and ouer,
'Tis threefold too little for carrying a letter to your louer
Pro. But what said she?
Sp. I
Pro. Nod-I, why that's noddy
Sp. You mistooke Sir: I say she did nod;
And you aske me if she did nod, and I say I
Pro. And that set together is noddy
Sp. Now you haue taken the paines to set it together, take it for your paines
Pro. No, no, you shall haue it for bearing the letter
Sp. Well, I perceiue I must be faine to beare with you
Pro. Why Sir, how doe you beare with me?
Sp. Marry Sir, the letter very orderly,
Hauing nothing but the word noddy for my paines
Pro. Beshrew me, but you haue a quicke wit
Sp. And yet it cannot ouer-take your slow purse
Pro. Come, come, open the matter in briefe; what
said she
Sp. Open your purse, that the money, and the matter
may be both at once deliuered
Pro. Well Sir: here is for your paines: what said she?
Sp. Truely Sir, I thinke you'll hardly win her
Pro. Why? could'st thou perceiue so much from her?
Sp. Sir, I could perceiue nothing at all from her;
No, not so much as a ducket for deliuering your letter:
And being so hard to me, that brought your minde;
I feare she'll proue as hard to you in telling your minde.
Giue her no token but stones, for she's as hard as steele
Pro. What said she, nothing?
Sp. No, not so much as take this for thy pains:
To testifie your bounty, I thank you, you haue cestern'd me;
In requital whereof, henceforth, carry your letters your
selfe; And so Sir, I'le commend you to my Master
Pro. Go, go, be gone, to saue your Ship from wrack,
Which cannot perish hauing thee aboarde,
Being destin'd to a drier death on shore:
I must goe send some better Messenger,
I feare my Iulia would not daigne my lines,
Receiuing them from such a worthlesse post.
Enter.
Scoena Secunda.
Enter Iulia and Lucetta.
Iul. But say Lucetta (now we are alone)
Would'st thou then counsaile me to fall in loue?
Luc. I Madam, so you stumble not vnheedfully
Iul. Of all the faire resort of Gentlemen,
That euery day with par'le encounter me,
In thy opinion which is worthiest loue?
Lu. Please you repeat their names, ile shew my minde,
According to my shallow simple skill
Iu. What thinkst thou of the faire sir Eglamoure?
Lu. As of a Knight, well-spoken, neat, and fine;
But were I you, he neuer should be mine
Iu. What think'st thou of the rich Mercatio?
Lu. Well of his wealth; but of himselfe, so, so
Iu. What think'st thou of the gentle Protheus?
Lu. Lord, Lord: to see what folly raignes in vs
Iu. How now? what meanes this passion at his name?
Lu. Pardon deare Madam, 'tis a passing shame,
That I (vnworthy body as I am)
Should censure thus on louely Gentlemen
Iu. Why not on Protheus, as of all the rest?
Lu. Then thus: of many good, I thinke him best
Iul. Your reason?
Lu. I haue no other but a womans reason:
I thinke him so, because I thinke him so
Iul. And would'st thou haue me cast my loue on him?
Lu. I: if you thought your loue not cast away
Iul. Why he, of all the rest, hath neuer mou'd me
Lu. Yet he, of all the rest, I thinke best loues ye
Iul. His little speaking, shewes his loue but small
Lu. Fire that's closest kept, burnes most of all
Iul. They doe not loue, that doe not shew their loue
Lu. Oh, they loue least, that let men know their loue
Iul. I would I knew his minde
Lu. Peruse this paper Madam
Iul. To Iulia: say, from whom?
Lu. That the Contents will shew
Iul. Say, say: who gaue it thee?
Lu. Sir Valentines page: & sent I think from Protheus;
He would haue giuen it you, but I being in the way,
Did in your name receiue it: pardon the fault I pray
Iul. Now (by my modesty) a goodly Broker:
Dare you presume to harbour wanton lines?
To whisper, and conspire against my youth?
Now trust me, 'tis an office of great worth,
And you an officer fit for the place:
There: take the paper: see it be return'd,
Or else returne no more into my sight
Lu. To plead for loue, deserues more fee, then hate
Iul. Will ye be gon?
Lu. That you may ruminate.
Enter.
Iul. And yet I would I had ore-look'd the Letter;
It were a shame to call her backe againe,
And pray her to a fault, for which I chid her.
What 'foole is she, that knowes I am a Maid,
And would not force the letter to my view?
Since Maides, in modesty, say no, to that,
Which they would haue the profferer construe, I.
Fie, fie: how way-ward is this foolish loue;
That (like a testie Babe) will scratch the Nurse,
And presently, all humbled kisse the Rod?
How churlishly, I chid Lucetta hence,
When willingly, I would haue had her here?
How angerly I taught my brow to frowne,
When inward ioy enforc'd my heart to smile?
My pennance is, to call Lucetta backe
And aske remission, for my folly past.
What hoe: Lucetta
Lu. What would your Ladiship?
Iul. Is't neere dinner time?
Lu. I would it were,
That you might kill your stomacke on your meat,
And not vpon your Maid
Iu. What is't that you
Tooke vp so gingerly?
Lu. Nothing
Iu. Why didst thou stoope then?
Lu. To take a paper vp, that I let fall
Iul. And is that paper nothing?
Lu. Nothing concerning me
Iul. Then let it lye, for those that it concernes
Lu. Madam, it will not lye where it concernes,
Vnlesse it haue a false Interpreter
Iul. Some loue of yours, hath writ to you in Rime
Lu. That I might sing it (Madam) to a tune:
Giue me a Note, your Ladiship can set
Iul. As little by such toyes, as may be possible:
Best sing it to the tune of Light O, Loue
Lu. It is too heauy for so light a tune
Iu. Heauy? belike it hath some burden then?
Lu. I: and melodious were it, would you sing it,
Iu. And why not you?
Lu. I cannot reach so high
Iu. Let's see your Song:
How now Minion?
Lu. Keepe tune there still; so you will sing it out:
And yet me thinkes I do not like this tune
Iu. You doe not?
Lu. No (Madam) tis too sharpe
Iu. You (Minion) are too saucie
Lu. Nay, now you are too flat;
And marre the concord, with too harsh a descant:
There wanteth but a Meane to fill your Song
Iu. The meane is dround with you vnruly base
Lu. Indeede I bid the base for Protheus
Iu. This babble shall not henceforth trouble me;
Here is a coile with protestation:
Goe, get you gone: and let the papers lye:
You would be fingring them, to anger me
Lu. She makes it stra[n]ge, but she would be best pleas'd
To be so angred with another Letter
Iu. Nay, would I were so angred with the same:
Oh hatefull hands, to teare such louing words;
Iniurious Waspes, to feede on such sweet hony,
And kill the Bees that yeelde it, with your stings;
Ile kisse each seuerall paper, for amends:
Looke, here is writ, kinde Iulia: vnkinde Iulia,
As in reuenge of thy ingratitude,
I throw thy name against the bruzing-stones,
Trampling contemptuously on thy disdaine.
And here is writ, Loue wounded Protheus.
Poore wounded name: my bosome, as a bed,
Shall lodge thee till thy wound be throughly heal'd;
And thus I search it with a soueraigne kisse.
But twice, or thrice, was Protheus written downe:
Be calme (good winde) blow not a word away,
Till I haue found each letter, in the Letter,
Except mine own name: That, some whirle-winde beare
Vnto a ragged, fearefull, hanging Rocke,
And throw it thence into the raging Sea.
Loe, here in one line is his name twice writ:
Poore forlorne Protheus, passionate Protheus:
To the sweet Iulia: that ile teare away:
And yet I will not, sith so prettily
He couples it, to his complaining Names;
Thus will I fold them, one vpon another;
Now kisse, embrace, contend, doe what you will
Lu. Madam: dinner is ready: and your father staies
Iu. Well, let vs goe
Lu. What, shall these papers lye, like Tel-tales here?
Iu. If you respect them; best to take them vp
Lu. Nay, I was taken vp, for laying them downe.
Yet here they shall not lye, for catching cold
Iu. I see you haue a months minde to them
Lu. I (Madam) you may say what sights you see;
I see things too, although you iudge I winke
Iu. Come, come, wilt please you goe.
Exeunt.
Scoena Tertia.
Enter Antonio and Panthino. Protheus.
Ant. Tell me Panthino, what sad talke was that,
Wherewith my brother held you in the Cloyster?
Pan. 'Twas of his Nephew Protheus, your Sonne
Ant. Why? what of him?
Pan. He wondred that your Lordship
Would suffer him, to spend his youth at home,
While other men, of slender reputation
Put forth their Sonnes, to seeke preferment out.
Some to the warres, to try their fortune there;
Some, to discouer Islands farre away:
Some, to the studious Vniuersities;
For any, or for all these exercises,
He said, that Protheus, your sonne, was meet;
And did request me, to importune you
To let him spend his time no more at home;
Which would be great impeachment to his age,
In hauing knowne no trauaile in his youth
Ant. Nor need'st thou much importune me to that
Whereon, this month I haue bin hamering.
I haue consider'd well, his losse of time,
And how he cannot be a perfect man,
Not being tryed, and tutord in the world:
Experience is by industry atchieu'd,
And perfected by the swift course of time:
Then tell me, whether were I best to send him?
Pan. I thinke your Lordship is not ignorant
How his companion, youthfull Valentine,
Attends the Emperour in his royall Court
Ant. I know it well
Pan. 'Twere good, I thinke, your Lordship sent him
(thither,
There shall he practise Tilts, and Turnaments;
Heare sweet discourse, conuerse with Noble-men,
And be in eye of euery Exercise
Worthy his youth, and noblenesse of birth
Ant. I like thy counsaile: well hast thou aduis'd:
And that thou maist perceiue how well I like it,
The execution of it shall make knowne;
Euen with the speediest expedition,
I will dispatch him to the Emperors Court
Pan. To morrow, may it please you, Don Alphonso,
With other Gentlemen of good esteeme
Are iournying, to salute the Emperor,
And to commend their seruice to his will
Ant. Good company: with them shall Protheus go:
And in good time: now will we breake with him
Pro. Sweet Loue, sweet lines, sweet life,
Here is her hand, the agent of her heart;
Here is her oath for loue, her honors paune;
O that our Fathers would applaud our loues
To seale our happinesse with their consents
Pro. Oh heauenly Iulia
Ant. How now? What Letter are you reading there?
Pro. May't please your Lordship, 'tis a word or two
Of commendations sent from Valentine;
Deliuer'd by a friend, that came from him
Ant. Lend me the Letter: Let me see what newes
Pro. There is no newes (my Lord) but that he writes
How happily he liues, how well-belou'd,
And daily graced by the Emperor;
Wishing me with him, partner of his fortune
Ant. And how stand you affected to his wish?
Pro. As one relying on your Lordships will,
And not depending on his friendly wish
Ant. My will is something sorted with his wish:
Muse not that I thus sodainly proceed;
For what I will, I will, and there an end:
I am resolu'd, that thou shalt spend some time
With Valentinus, in the Emperors Court:
What maintenance he from his friends receiues,
Like exhibition thou shalt haue from me,
To morrow be in readinesse, to goe,
Excuse it not: for I am peremptory
Pro. My Lord I cannot be so soone prouided,
Please you deliberate a day or two
Ant. Look what thou want'st shalbe sent after thee:
No more of stay: to morrow thou must goe;
Come on Panthino; you shall be imployd,
To hasten on his Expedition
Pro. Thus haue I shund the fire, for feare of burning,
And drench'd me in the sea, where I am drown'd.
I fear'd to shew my Father Iulias Letter,
Least he should take exceptions to my loue,
And with the vantage of mine owne excuse
Hath he excepted most against my loue.
Oh, how this spring of loue resembleth
The vncertaine glory of an Aprill day,
Which now shewes all the beauty of the Sun,
And by and by a clowd takes all away
Pan. Sir Protheus, your Fathers call's for you,
He is in hast, therefore I pray you go
Pro. Why this it is: my heart accords thereto,
And yet a thousand times it answer's no.
Exeunt. Finis.
Actus secundus: Scoena Prima.
Enter Valentine, Speed, Siluia
Speed. Sir, your Gloue
Valen. Not mine: my Gloues are on
Sp. Why then this may be yours: for this is but one
Val. Ha? Let me see: I, giue it me, it's mine:
Sweet Ornament, that deckes a thing diuine,
Ah Siluia, Siluia
Speed. Madam Siluia: Madam Siluia
Val. How now Sirha?
Speed. Shee is not within hearing Sir
Val. Why sir, who bad you call her?
Speed. Your worship sir, or else I mistooke
Val. Well: you'll still be too forward
Speed. And yet I was last chidden for being too slow
Val. Goe to, sir, tell me: do you know Madam Siluia? Speed. Shee that your worship loues? Val. Why, how know you that I am in loue? Speed. Marry by these speciall markes: first, you haue learn'd (like Sir Protheus) to wreath your Armes like a Male-content: to rellish a Loue-song, like a Robin-redbreast: to walke alone like one that had the pestilence: to sigh, like a Schoole-boy that had lost his A.B.C. to weep like a yong wench that had buried her Grandam: to fast, like one that takes diet: to watch, like one that feares robbing: to speake puling, like a beggar at Hallow-Masse: You were wont, when you laughed, to crow like a cocke; when you walk'd, to walke like one of the Lions: when you fasted, it was presently after dinner: when you look'd sadly, it was for want of money: And now you are Metamorphis'd with a Mistris, that when I looke on you, I can hardly thinke you my Master
Val. Are all these things perceiu'd in me?
Speed. They are all perceiu'd without ye
Val. Without me? they cannot
Speed. Without you? nay, that's certaine: for without you were so simple, none else would: but you are so without these follies, that these follies are within you, and shine through you like the water in an Vrinall: that not an eye that sees you, but is a Physician to comment on your Malady
Val. But tell me: do'st thou know my Lady Siluia?
Speed. Shee that you gaze on so, as she sits at supper?
Val. Hast thou obseru'd that? euen she I meane
Speed. Why sir, I know her not
Val. Do'st thou know her by my gazing on her, and
yet know'st her not?
Speed. Is she not hard-fauour'd, sir?
Val. Not so faire (boy) as well fauour'd
Speed. Sir, I know that well enough
Val. What dost thou know?
Speed. That shee is not so faire, as (of you) well-fauourd?
Val. I meane that her beauty is exquisite,
But her fauour infinite
Speed. That's because the one is painted, and the other
out of all count
Val. How painted? and how out of count?
Speed. Marry sir, so painted to make her faire, that no
man counts of her beauty
Val. How esteem'st thou me? I account of her beauty
Speed. You neuer saw her since she was deform'd
Val. How long hath she beene deform'd?
Speed. Euer since you lou'd her
Val. I haue lou'd her euer since I saw her,
And still I see her beautifull
Speed. If you loue her, you cannot see her
Val. Why?
Speed. Because Loue is blinde: O that you had mine
eyes, or your owne eyes had the lights they were wont
to haue, when you chidde at Sir Protheus, for going vngarter'd
Val. What should I see then? Speed. Your owne present folly, and her passing deformitie: for hee beeing in loue, could not see to garter his hose; and you, beeing in loue, cannot see to put on your hose
Val. Belike (boy) then you are in loue, for last morning
You could not see to wipe my shooes
Speed. True sir: I was in loue with my bed, I thanke you, you swing'd me for my loue, which makes mee the bolder to chide you, for yours
Val. In conclusion, I stand affected to her
Speed. I would you were set, so your affection would
cease
Val. Last night she enioyn'd me,
To write some lines to one she loues
Speed. And haue you?
Val. I haue
Speed. Are they not lamely writt?
Val. No (Boy) but as well as I can do them:
Peace, here she comes
Speed. Oh excellent motion; oh exceeding Puppet:
Now will he interpret to her
Val. Madam & Mistres, a thousand good-morrows
Speed. Oh, 'giue ye-good-ev'n: heer's a million of manners
Sil. Sir Valentine, and seruant, to you two thousand
Speed. He should giue her interest: & she giues it him
Val. As you inioynd me; I haue writ your Letter
Vnto the secret, nameles friend of yours:
Which I was much vnwilling to proceed in,
But for my duty to your Ladiship
Sil. I thanke you (gentle Seruant) 'tis very Clerklydone
Val. Now trust me (Madam) it came hardly-off:
For being ignorant to whom it goes,
I writ at randome, very doubtfully
Sil. Perchance you think too much of so much pains?
Val. No (Madam) so it steed you, I will write
(Please you command) a thousand times as much:
And yet -
Sil. A pretty period: well: I ghesse the sequell;
And yet I will not name it: and yet I care not.
And yet, take this againe: and yet I thanke you:
Meaning henceforth to trouble you no more
Speed. And yet you will: and yet, another yet
Val. What meanes your Ladiship?
Doe you not like it?
Sil. Yes, yes: the lines are very queintly writ,
But (since vnwillingly) take them againe.
Nay, take them
Val. Madam, they are for you
Silu. I, I: you writ them Sir, at my request,
But I will none of them: they are for you:
I would haue had them writ more mouingly:
Val. Please you, Ile write your Ladiship another
Sil. And when it's writ: for my sake read it ouer,
And if it please you, so: if not: why so:
Val. If it please me, (Madam?) what then?
Sil. Why if it please you, take it for your labour;
And so good-morrow Seruant.
Exit. Sil.
Speed. Oh Iest vnseene: inscrutible: inuisible,
As a nose on a mans face, or a Wethercocke on a steeple:
My Master sues to her: and she hath taught her Sutor,
He being her Pupill, to become her Tutor.
Oh excellent deuise, was there euer heard a better?
That my master being scribe,
To himselfe should write the Letter?
Val. How now Sir?
What are you reasoning with your selfe?
Speed. Nay: I was riming: 'tis you y haue the reason
Val. To doe what?
Speed. To be a Spokes-man from Madam Siluia
Val. To whom?
Speed. To your selfe: why, she woes you by a figure
Val. What figure?
Speed. By a Letter, I should say
Val. Why she hath not writ to me?
Speed. What need she,
When shee hath made you write to your selfe?
Why, doe you not perceiue the iest?
Val. No, beleeue me
Speed. No beleeuing you indeed sir:
But did you perceiue her earnest?
Val. She gaue me none, except an angry word
Speed. Why she hath giuen you a Letter
Val. That's the Letter I writ to her friend
Speed. And y letter hath she deliuer'd, & there an end
Val. I would it were no worse
Speed. Ile warrant you, 'tis as well:
For often haue you writ to her: and she in modesty,
Or else for want of idle time, could not againe reply,
Or fearing els some messe[n]ger, y might her mind discouer
Her self hath taught her Loue himself, to write vnto her louer.
All this I speak in print, for in print I found it.
Why muse you sir, 'tis dinner time
Val. I haue dyn'd
Speed. I, but hearken sir: though the Cameleon Loue can feed on the ayre, I am one that am nourish'd by my victuals; and would faine haue meate: oh bee not like your Mistresse, be moued, be moued.
Exeunt.
Scoena secunda.
Enter Protheus, Iulia, Panthion.
Pro. Haue patience, gentle Iulia:
Iul. I must where is no remedy
Pro. When possibly I can, I will returne
Iul. If you turne not: you will return the sooner:
Keepe this remembrance for thy Iulia's sake
Pro. Why then wee'll make exchange;
Here, take you this
Iul. And seale the bargaine with a holy kisse
Pro. Here is my hand, for my true constancie:
And when that howre ore-slips me in the day,
Wherein I sigh not (Iulia) for thy sake,
The next ensuing howre, some foule mischance
Torment me for my Loues forgetfulnesse:
My father staies my comming: answere not:
The tide is now; nay, not thy tide of teares,
That tide will stay me longer then I should,
Iulia, farewell: what, gon without a word?
I, so true loue should doe: it cannot speake,
For truth hath better deeds, then words to grace it
Panth. Sir Protheus: you are staid for
Pro. Goe: I come, I come:
Alas, this parting strikes poore Louers dumbe.
Exeunt.
Scoena Tertia.
Enter Launce, Panthion.
Launce. Nay, 'twill bee this howre ere I haue done weeping: all the kinde of the Launces, haue this very fault: I haue receiu'd my proportion, like the prodigious Sonne, and am going with Sir Protheus to the Imperialls Court: I thinke Crab my dog, be the sowrest natured dogge that liues: My Mother weeping: my Father wayling: my Sister crying: our Maid howling: our Catte wringing her hands, and all our house in a great perplexitie, yet did not this cruell-hearted Curre shedde one teare: he is a stone, a very pibble stone, and has no more pitty in him then a dogge: a Iew would haue wept to haue seene our parting: why my Grandam hauing no eyes, looke you, wept her selfe blinde at my parting: nay, Ile shew you the manner of it. This shooe is my father: no, this left shooe is my father; no, no, this left shooe is my mother: nay, that cannot bee so neyther: yes; it is so, it is so: it hath the worser sole: this shooe with the hole in it, is my mother: and this my father: a veng'ance on't, there 'tis: Now sir, this staffe is my sister: for, looke you, she is as white as a lilly, and as small as a wand: this hat is Nan our maid: I am the dogge: no, the dogge is himselfe, and I am the dogge: oh, the dogge is me, and I am my selfe: I; so, so: now come I to my Father; Father, your blessing: now should not the shooe speake a word for weeping: now should I kisse my Father; well, hee weepes on: Now come I to my Mother: Oh that she could speake now, like a would-woman: well, I kisse her: why there 'tis; heere's my mothers breath vp and downe: Now come I to my sister; marke the moane she makes: now the dogge all this while sheds not a teare: nor speakes a word: but see how I lay the dust with my teares
Panth. Launce, away, away: a Boord: thy Master is ship'd, and thou art to post after with oares; what's the matter? why weep'st thou man? away asse, you'l loose the Tide, if you tarry any longer
Laun. It is no matter if the tide were lost, for it is the
vnkindest Tide, that euer any man tide
Panth. What's the vnkindest tide?
Lau. Why, he that's tide here, Crab my dog
Pant. Tut, man: I meane thou'lt loose the flood, and in loosing the flood, loose thy voyage, and in loosing thy voyage, loose thy Master, and in loosing thy Master, loose thy seruice, and in loosing thy seruice: - why dost thou stop my mouth? Laun. For feare thou shouldst loose thy tongue
Panth. Where should I loose my tongue?
Laun. In thy Tale
Panth. In thy Taile
Laun. Loose the Tide, and the voyage, and the Master, and the Seruice, and the tide: why man, if the Riuer were drie, I am able to fill it with my teares: if the winde were downe, I could driue the boate with my sighes
Panth. Come: come away man, I was sent to call thee
Lau. Sir: call me what thou dar'st
Pant. Wilt thou goe?
Laun. Well, I will goe.
Exeunt.
Scena Quarta.
Enter Valentine, Siluia, Thurio, Speed, Duke, Protheus.
Sil. Seruant
Val. Mistris
Spee. Master, Sir Thurio frownes on you
Val. I Boy, it's for loue
Spee. Not of you
Val. Of my Mistresse then
Spee. 'Twere good you knockt him
Sil. Seruant, you are sad
Val. Indeed, Madam, I seeme so
Thu. Seeme you that you are not?
Val. Hap'ly I doe
Thu. So doe Counterfeyts
Val. So doe you
Thu. What seeme I that I am not?
Val. Wise
Thu. What instance of the contrary?
Val. Your folly
Thu. And how quoat you my folly?
Val. I quoat it in your Ierkin
Thu. My Ierkin is a doublet
Val. Well then, Ile double your folly
Thu. How?
Sil. What, angry, Sir Thurio, do you change colour?
Val. Giue him leaue, Madam, he is a kind of Camelion
Thu. That hath more minde to feed on your bloud,
then liue in your ayre
Val. You haue said Sir
Thu. I Sir, and done too for this time
Val. I know it wel sir, you alwaies end ere you begin
Sil. A fine volly of words, gentleme[n], & quickly shot off
Val. 'Tis indeed, Madam, we thank the giuer
Sil. Who is that Seruant?
Val. Your selfe (sweet Lady) for you gaue the fire,
Sir Thurio borrows his wit from your Ladiships lookes,
And spends what he borrowes kindly in your company
Thu. Sir, if you spend word for word with me, I shall
make your wit bankrupt
Val. I know it well sir: you haue an Exchequer of words,
And I thinke, no other treasure to giue your followers:
For it appeares by their bare Liueries
That they liue by your bare words
Sil. No more, gentlemen, no more:
Here comes my father
Duk. Now, daughter Siluia, you are hard beset.
Sir Valentine, your father is in good health,
What say you to a Letter from your friends
Of much good newes?
Val. My Lord, I will be thankfull,
To any happy messenger from thence
Duk. Know ye Don Antonio, your Countriman?
Val. I, my good Lord, I know the Gentleman
To be of worth, and worthy estimation,
And not without desert so well reputed
Duk. Hath he not a Sonne?
Val. I, my good Lord, a Son, that well deserues
The honor, and regard of such a father
Duk. You know him well?
Val. I knew him as my selfe: for from our Infancie
We haue conuerst, and spent our howres together,
And though my selfe haue beene an idle Trewant,
Omitting the sweet benefit of time
To cloath mine age with Angel-like perfection:
Yet hath Sir Protheus (for that's his name)
Made vse, and faire aduantage of his daies:
His yeares but yong, but his experience old:
His head vn-mellowed, but his Iudgement ripe;
And in a word (for far behinde his worth
Comes all the praises that I now bestow.)
He is compleat in feature, and in minde,
With all good grace, to grace a Gentleman
Duk. Beshrew me sir, but if he make this good
He is as worthy for an Empresse loue,
As meet to be an Emperors Councellor:
Well, Sir: this Gentleman is come to me
With Commendation from great Potentates,
And heere he meanes to spend his time a while,
I thinke 'tis no vn-welcome newes to you
Val. Should I haue wish'd a thing, it had beene he
Duk. Welcome him then according to his worth:
Siluia, I speake to you, and you Sir Thurio,
For Valentine, I need not cite him to it,
I will send him hither to you presently
Val. This is the Gentleman I told your Ladiship
Had come along with me, but that his Mistresse
Did hold his eyes, lockt in her Christall lookes
Sil. Be-like that now she hath enfranchis'd them
Vpon some other pawne for fealty
Val. Nay sure, I thinke she holds them prisoners stil
Sil. Nay then he should be blind, and being blind
How could he see his way to seeke out you?
Val. Why Lady, Loue hath twenty paire of eyes
Thur. They say that Loue hath not an eye at all
Val. To see such Louers, Thurio, as your selfe,
Vpon a homely obiect, Loue can winke
Sil. Haue done, haue done: here comes y gentleman
Val. Welcome, deer Protheus: Mistris, I beseech you
Confirme his welcome, with some speciall fauor
Sil. His worth is warrant for his welcome hether,
If this be he you oft haue wish'd to heare from
Val. Mistris, it is: sweet Lady, entertaine him
To be my fellow-seruant to your Ladiship
Sil. Too low a Mistres for so high a seruant
Pro. Not so, sweet Lady, but too meane a seruant
To haue a looke of such a worthy a Mistresse
Val. Leaue off discourse of disabilitie:
Sweet Lady, entertaine him for your Seruant
Pro. My dutie will I boast of, nothing else
Sil. And dutie neuer yet did want his meed.
Seruant, you are welcome to a worthlesse Mistresse
Pro. Ile die on him that saies so but your selfe
Sil. That you are welcome?
Pro. That you are worthlesse
Thur. Madam, my Lord your father wold speak with you
Sil. I wait vpon his pleasure: Come Sir Thurio,
Goe with me: once more, new Seruant welcome;
Ile leaue you to confer of home affaires,
When you haue done, we looke too heare from you
Pro. Wee'll both attend vpon your Ladiship
Val. Now tell me: how do al from whence you came?
Pro. Your frends are wel, & haue the[m] much co[m]mended
Val. And how doe yours?
Pro. I left them all in health
Val. How does your Lady? & how thriues your loue?
Pro. My tales of Loue were wont to weary you,
I know you ioy not in a Loue-discourse
Val. I Protheus, but that life is alter'd now,
I haue done pennance for contemning Loue,
Whose high emperious thoughts haue punish'd me
With bitter fasts, with penitentiall grones,
With nightly teares, and daily hart-sore sighes,
For in reuenge of my contempt of loue,
Loue hath chas'd sleepe from my enthralled eyes,
And made them watchers of mine owne hearts sorrow.
O gentle Protheus, Loue's a mighty Lord,
And hath so humbled me, as I confesse
There is no woe to his correction,
Nor to his Seruice, no such ioy on earth:
Now, no discourse, except it be of loue:
Now can I breake my fast, dine, sup, and sleepe,
Vpon the very naked name of Loue
Pro. Enough; I read your fortune in your eye:
Was this the Idoll, that you worship so?
Val. Euen She; and is she not a heauenly Saint?
Pro. No; But she is an earthly Paragon